The Life and Times of Joshua Clayton

Out West for the Summer

2010-05-29T11:46:00.003-05:00

This is working out nicely: remembering to blog every half-year and then giving a fairly succint summary of thoughts on such chunk of time. I didn't even think my blog mattered any more, but then three fairly important individuals within a month or so told me that they had looked at my blog: my wife, one of my good friends, and a potential employer.

Picking up from last December, at Christmastime, Amanda and I went to Natchitoches, Louisiana for an overnight stay at a bed 'n breakfast. We saw the famed "City of Lights" in all its beauty, took a horsedrawn carriage ride, experienced the forced pleasure of dining at breakfast with couples twice our age, learned about Steel Magnolias, visited forts and other historic sites, and saw a real ole' fashion' gen'ral store. Meanwhile I had the pleasure of editing a professor's Torts nutshell, and before I knew it, the Spring Semester started.

Law school was busy, busy in the Spring, for me. I thought that taking 14 hours, as opposed to 15, would make things a bit easier, but with 5 exams, no matter. I was able to clerk with a great law firm around 20 or so hours per week, as well as performing research work for a renowned Louisiana professor. I continued and finished editing my own legal article, which is scheduled to be published in about a year. Additionally, I accepted a position on the Louisiana Law Review Board of Editors for Volume 71. My classes were really interesting. Bankruptcy taught me that there is this magical kingdom created by the filing of the petition / order for relief. There is a magical shield of protection from creditors [The Automatic Stay], time travel in the form of reachback period to recover fraudulent conveyances made by the debtor [Avoidance Powers], and superhuman abilities to either assume or reject certain conventional obligations [Executory Contracts]. In Insurance, we learned about UM coverage, automobile liability insurance, etc. But what I best remember are a few learned cases: the Louisiana Supreme Court making statements like, "Hell hath no fury like a woman's scorn"; an accidental death indemnity provision being interpreted in a case where the insured exclaimed that the town wasn't big enough for the "two of us" and one of them was "going to have to die"; and looking at the ancient roots of the "insurable interest" requirement of property insurance, prior to which Chinese merchants got insurance on other folks' boats--a sort of primitive gambling. I have no words of sarcasm for Commercial Paper--it was genuinely fascinating to learn how our banking system works, but also inherently dry, which is why there are no humorous words to describe it. Legal Ethics taught me to do the right thing, and Jurisprudence taught me that we should all give up hope in defining what the "law" is because no one will ever know. I really did enjoy classes, though. Grades weren't half bad, either.

"First year they scare you to death. Second year they work you to death." Aside from the "death" aspect, this has been true so far. In the Law School Almanac, we read further, "...Third year they bore you to death." Ahhhh. Savory, sweet boredom, I mind you not. Come to me like a summer's day--oh successions and donations, you darling thing. Who knows, now maybe I'll even become a normal homo sapien and exercise my body more than once per month!

Speaking of which, I'm happy with myself, for now. I've been exercising almost every day for the past two weeks. Amanda and I are staying in Houston with her parents for the summer, while I have the blessing of clerking for two prestigious firms. And I get to grade the law review hopefuls' papers starting next week. I've always wanted to know what it's like to be a teacher and grade papers at night ... [?] ... . But when I'm done with that, on weekends, the Missus and I are definitely going to have to see us some Texas. Some Austin [music and huge urban bat population that lives under some bridge], San Antonio [Custer's last stand ... or Davy's Crockett's ... I honestly cannot remember for the life of me who fought at the Alamo], and New Braunfels [or at least the Schlitterbahn part of it].

This calendar year has had a couple firsts, for me. I lost my first grandparent. My dear Grandpa Tippin crossed the waters into the Celestial City just this March. My tears, mingled with comfort and some bitterness, were not for him, but only for the living who miss him so. My uncle performed a gentle version of "I Will Rise" at his memorial service, and hearing the song on the radio even now makes me thing of Grandpa.

I've always been a healthy kid growing up and thought that weird physical ailments were for Other People. But a tension headache and the discovery that my jaw is literally crooked has made me realize otherwise. Oh well. There's always health insurance. Wait...

Moving on, I literally, moved on. I drove my first U-haul truck, putting all our stuff in storage for the summer. And had my first sushimi, or sashimi, or whatever it's called, last night. Might never do that again; I'll stick with rolls.

Remember Saint Augustine? Don't. Remember Jesus, instead. But Aug had some things to say that point me to Jesus, that I love, including something along the lines of: our hearts have been made for God by God, and these hearts are restless until they find rest in Him. And that sums up my stage in the Spiritual Journey right now: desperate and clinging--but hopeful--but restless for More, and All. The time is short.

Amanda and I are both a bit restless, perhaps. That darling had a hard year. I will stand toe-to-toe with anyone who says that she is anything other that she is One Strong Woman. She taught a bunch of rowdy little...angels for a whole year and survived. She'll tell you that teaching in the public school system is the hardest thing she has ever done. I'm ready to get out of law school and start making respectable money so that she can do something else. Not that she doesn't love kids and teachers are admirable figures, but as her husband I say another year, or less, of this is more than enough for her lifetime.

Houston is nice, I guess. 45 minute commute to work; could be worse. I've never heard a meaner hiss come from a domestic animal as I've heard come from my mom and dad -in-law's cat, whenever Amanda and I's kitty walks by. Wait, I'm starting to sound negative, when I don't intend to. Actually, I love Amanda's parents and I am humbled that they would host us for the summer, and am eager to spend as much time with them as I can. Dad even said we would go running together tonight, which of course is exciting because I already accepted the fact he's going to give me a butt-whoopin' in this Heat.

Somebody pass me a 10-gallon head ornament and plate of barbeque!

'Daswha'mtalkinbout.

2009-12-20T22:15:00.004-06:00

Watching the Lord of the Rings extended edition movie trilogy, making sure my wife's third graders' cotton balls are glued onto snowmen and not each other, wrapping presents in Precious Moments paper, blasting Relient K's version of "Angels We Have Heard on High" and Bing Crosby's version of "Adestes Fideles," gazing in wonder at the a cajun-flavored version of the The Nutcracker ballet, a Sabbath day in God's presence without having to rush home to get ready for work/school the next day, watching The Nativity Story with my wife and putting up a nativity scene above the television, setting up a new computer and making hot cocoa for my wife asleep on the couch, who said she will wake up and play Star Wars Battlefront with me tonight or tomorrow.

Reflection

2009-12-11T22:11:00.005-06:00

Reflection is now more important than ever, which is why there is the least time available for it. My reflection in the mirror reveals what I think I can no longer pretend to not be a gray hair or two (though I partly maintain it is a blonde streak from my early childhood years). Some would say it's the stress of what has been my toughest semester of law school, others that it is wisdom. I am agnostic. However, I have become more certain than ever that I am both an imperfect man and a man who will do whatever it takes to strive for excellence.

Halfway through law school, as I took my last final exam a couple days ago, all the motion stopped for a minute. And suddenly, though there are no more 15 hour workdays, I am more tired than ever. The Law Review paper is written, the classes complete, the ink pens and highlighters run dry. And I am finally conscious of the need for a time of refreshing.

I can take external pressure; it's a soul in travail that can't be lived with, like, I have heard, a ship tossed in the waves. It's not the external force of waters that will sink the vessel, but that which seeps in, through the cracks.

There is so much pressure to stay ranked first in class. However, I can find no joy in labor other than exertion to the fullest extent possible and rejoicing in toil irrespective of the fruit it bears.

The opportunities have changed, but the eternal macrocosm is immutable. The priorities must follow suit, for, to quote William Jay, "Oh that we estimated our souls as [H]e estimates them. Every thing else would appear less than nothing and vanity compared with their salvation."

That's all I have to say for now.

Blink

2009-09-19T10:49:00.002-05:00

In the blink of an eye, all this changes.
Everything. Nothing is left untouched.
No measure of wishing could bring it,
Whatever loathing insufficient to prevent it,
It waits for no one, inverting,
Burning, destroying a life's work,
Edifying, making inviolable another's treasure.
Of all the things that mattered, none remains.
Riches to rags and rags to riches,
Primordial terminal, last first.
The blink of an eye changes nothing,
For we should have seen it coming all along.
We can't say He never warned us,
That all along, there was not much time left.

All

2009-09-18T15:59:00.003-05:00

I Corinthians 10:31 "Whether therefore ye eat, or drink, or whatsoever ye do, do all to the glory of God." [emphasis added]

I have been brooding over how to implement this instruction in my life, praying daily, "God how do I do everything to honor you?" It sounds simple enough. But in Christian circles it has the potential to become a mere truism. I have to take a good, hard look and determine whether I know I'm actually doing any given activity to the glory of God.

What about this: Let's say I graduate from law school in a couple years and become a potato farmer. If I felt bitter, as if my scholastic time was spent in waste, would I have really spent that time to the "glory of God?"
If I'm an athlete and sprain my ankle such that I can't play the championship game and I feel that my entire season previously has been mere vanity, does this comport with a notion that the first part of my season had value as exemplifying the "glory of God?"
If I host a Bible study and invite the whole town and only my wife and I actually show up to pray for an hour, and so I wonder if I'm a failure, does this mean I have failed to give "glory to God?"

Bitterness seems the antithesis of having truly performed an activity in honor of God. Isn't that the essence of what we're striving for, not to not care, but to care about what He cares about? Because if we're caring to act in ways that are concerned with what He cares about, which is what really is the only matter of concern, then we have acted for the glory of God.

Summer Breeze

2009-08-10T14:46:00.002-05:00

Summer 2009 breezed by for my wife and I. It was the fastest summer of my life thus far. The Monday morning after finishing spring final exams the Friday before, I began clerking at a local law firm and writing a paper for a competition to become a writer for the Louisiana Law Review. The first two weeks were the slowest, balancing time between writing about the constitutionality of Louisiana's anti-smoking ban for the competition and working in a law firm for the first time. But thankfully the time committment paid off; I have been accepted as a junior associate for the law review this fall.

The rest of the summer was spent both working part-time and in school full time. I had the privilege of clerking at two different law firms in downtown Baton Rouge this summer. I was at Kantrow, Spaht, Weaver & Blitzer for half the summer and at Taylor, Porter, Brooks & Phillips for the second half. Just as my professor had forecasted, Legal Research and Writing was the class most useful during my clerking experiences, mainly drafting research memoranda in support of legal theories and motions for summary judgment. Clerking was a great experience. It showed me how much I had learned in only a year of law school...and how much there is left to learn in an ever-changing and vast body of law. It's great to get extracurricular work in such areas ranging from products liability and commercial litigation to bankruptcy, taxation and employment discrimination.

The hardest thing this summer was balancing time between class and work. Whenever I was at work, I felt like I should be studying. Whenever in class, I felt like I should be working. I took Evidence with Professor Maraist and Constitutional Law II with Professor Baier. Both were rewarding and uniquely challenging experiences. Evidence proved to be my favorite subject thus far, and Constitutional Law II allowed a survey of nearly 350 cases, each of which we were responsible for. These past few months have been the most disciplined of my life, requiring trained monkey adherence:

7:30 a.m. - 8:45 a.m. Evidence class
8:55 - 10:10 Constitutional Law II class
10:30-4:00 Work
4:00-6:30 Studying
6:30-7:15 Exercise
7:30-11:00 p.m. Eat, more study, Bible, domestic life

Recreationally, I used my spare moments to play through Half-Life 2 for the xBox console, play softball for the law firms, had an outing with law students to play laser tag, and visited my mother- and father-in-law in Houston over July 4th. I turned 23 years of age this year, and was able to go jet skiing for the first time with Amanda while at Navarre Beach, Florida, in addition to acquiring my first ever thorough sunburn.

Amanda has been quite busy as she went through the Teach Baton Rouge program to become certified to teach this summer. She just began teaching last week and now educates a class of 21 young, eager minds in the third grade. I could not be prouder of her.

In other news, we finally got a pet, as we are not ready for a human child yet. I think we picked a good pet to simulate the 2-year-old experience, though. Ten-month-old Rocky is a sweet, constantly purring and people-loving kitten who loves to play with anything that moves...or does not move. I have been bonding much with him of late and he and I will be on even better terms once he stops assaulting me whenever I try to eat, requiring me to put him in the other room if I am to finish my repast in peace.

Other than the sunset in Navarre Beach and walking out onto a sandbar with my wife, one of the most beautifullestest things I have beheld this summer was a full, glowing rainbow across the horizon over the lakes at LSU. This was only a week ago and was the first time I have ever seen a full rainbow.

May Flowers: A Grace Manifesto

2009-05-30T10:47:00.002-05:00

Ancient writers would call on the muses to inspire them as they prepared to weave their tales. I don't wish to weave an inspired tale, but rather tell it truthfully as it should be told, so I have asked the Holy Spirit to assist my tongue [keystrokes] to proclaim the events as they really happened.

Backing up to January of this year, finding out I was first in my law school class was overwhelming and humbling. After prostrating myself before God and thanking Him for his enabling power (see John 15:4, Without Him we can do nothing), I enjoyed the next few weeks eating hors d'ouevres with attorneys and feeling like hard work pays off. But during the semester I noticed my footsteps were a bit heavier, putting in the hours studying was a bit more onerous. When something you love becomes a mere contest, rather than vice versa, scary things happen. For me, I love the order and logical coherency of the law (especially the La. Civ. Code). But as March turned into April, I realized that it's not all a bed of roses; the crucible of 2 weeks of 4-hour law school exams had returned again.

The weeks leading up to H-hour were brutal. For not just me, but every law student across the country. My wife tried telling me I was hitting it too hard, I needed to exercise more, etc., and she was right (alas!). By the time I was 25% through with exam period, I had worked myself into a frenzy of studying and anxiety that I had hopeless insomnia, a thing I had never experienced before. All I could do was focus during the day as much as I could and literally throw myself on God's mercy. It was the hardest 2 weeks of my young life thus far.

The following week I started clerking with a Baton Rouge law firm, as well as working on a law review write-on paper over the next two and a half weeks. Just this past week grades came out, and I prostrated myself in worship...again.

With a handicap of 3-4 hours of sleep per night, I actually did better than the semester before.

This blog is over five years old. When I first started it I was a bumbling kid coming out of high school, and apparently, well, now, I'm something or someone a bit different. And perhaps, now this blog is subject to review by important people now since it's title makes it appear first on a Google search. I see no reason to discontinue the transparency my understanding of why things happen the way they do. Hard work pays off, but it was the enabling grace of God that makes hard work fruitful (see Psalm 75:5-6, that promotion comes from God).

Thus, 2009 lessons learned:

Whatever work you set your hand to doing, you have to love it if you want to either do well or enjoy your life, or both.
The Lord gives and takes away; blessed be the Name of the Lord.
The brain is a place where investments are made. If you make the necessary deposits, the knowledge you need will be available for withdrawal, even under non-ideal circumstances.

March

2009-04-01T15:43:00.002-05:00

In the last month of blog news...
I'll start from tomorrow and work backwards. This week is nice because I'm doing something other than keeping my head buried in books on several weeknights. I can't help feeling like a bad boy, but tomorrow I'm going to see Jeremy Camp, Hawk Nelson, etc. in concert, tonight I'm going to the law school production of "Assault & Flattery," and last night I went to a scholarship reception. In the past week, I wrapped up my appellate advocacy class. I got to write an appellate brief and then orally argue in front of 2 "judges" why a noncompetition agreement signed by "my client" is not enforceable due to nullity. It was a semester-long case and it felt really good to be able to put everything I worked on into a final presentation in the "Moot Circuit" court. Amanda and I celebrated her 24th birthday this past weekend and conincidentally ended up eating out Friday through Sunday which was spoilingly nice, as well as going to the Baton Rouge zoo for the first time and getting to pet giraffes. Went to Acquire the Fire a couple weeks ago and enjoyed a great weekend seeking God with a bunch of high school kids. Several weeks ago I locked down summer employment at real legal firms that do real cases, so that is thrilling. And before that I evaded Sasquatch, the subject matter [jurisdiction] of the last post.

I'm sure other stuff happened in the last month that is actually more notable than what I am presenting but all I can think of is the dormant commerce clause, the vices of consent, bad faith acquisitive prescription, claim and rule preclusion, R.S. 23:921, and Officer McFadden.

Evading Sasquatch

2009-02-26T12:57:00.002-06:00

After calling several campgrounds the morning of the day we were supposed to go camping and being told "there's no room in the inn," I finally found a place that had open tent sites over the Mardi Gras break: Chicot State Park in Ville Platte, Louisiana.

Amanda and I finally kicked into high gear at noon, packing our bags and getting supplies for the trip. Singing songs and bubbling with excitement we piled all our belongings, strangely including a laptop computer containing a DVD movie and a set of Chinese checkers, into my red Chevy pickup and cruised on down the road. Pretty smooth sailing till just past Opelousas, where the Mapquest directions were wrong again and again. Before we knew it, a fella at the Cabot Power Plant was telling us, "Shore, yessir, y'can drive right through the plant down them gravel roads and get to the park that way."

After discovering that the dirt roads dead-ended at someone's property with a lot of barking and snarling dogs, we reversed course and finally arrived at the park as the sun was preparing to set. We drove around looking for a site and found to our dismay that it was the zoo. The sites were right next to each other and you would have thought it was the annual campers' convention. It was a metropolis of tents.

With rays of sunshine slipping below the horizon, my wife and I decided on a whim to do the "primitive camping" site. This is the deal where you park and then walk to your campsite. 2 mile hike to be exact. Out into the middle of the swampy woods where if you yelled no one but the raccoons and alligators and wild hogs oh my would hear you. Virtually running up and down the wooded hills, we arrived at a breathtaking site. Our elevated campsite was surrounded by a swampy lake. Very pretty.

We scrambled to set up a campfire as the sun slipped behind the horizon. Amidst a few sparks of fire and our flashlights, we set up the tent in the dark, with the owls already beginning to hoot.

True confession: If my wife had not been there, I don't know if the tent construction would have happened. I took one look at the instructions beneath my flashlight and knew that they were written by someone who spoke English as a second language, or perhaps a third or fourth. After she calmed me down, we got the thing established in less than an hour, built a roaring fire and ate hot dogs and marshmallows.

Things were going smooth, nice and wonderful until a wild beast started walking circles around our campsite just beyond the trees. I say "wild beast" because we never did find out what it was. But for the better part of an hour, we did huddle inside the tent, pointing our flashlights out at the trees and waiting for the sasquatch, or black bear, or whatever it was, to reveal itself. All I know is that sounded large enough to be a small man. Maybe I'm glad we never found out what it was. (Maybe it was a small man.)

But, oh, the stars! I've never seen them like that. I used to read about God promising Abraham and saying, "Abe, see if you can number the stars," of course with the latent idea that "No, Abe, you can't." I always used to think under my breath, "where I live, you can count 'em." Not this night. It was hard to find areas in the sky that were not "star".

You would think that three layers of clothes and a sleeping bag in Louisiana in February would be warm enough. But you'd be wrong in so thinking. It was frigid.

The evening of the next day after various wandering adventures in the woods, it was a little hard to say goodbye. As we hiked back to civilization, I thought to myself, "I could do this again." By the time I was asleep in my own bed that night, I had begun to second-guess that sentiment.

On Being a 1.5L

2009-02-12T15:38:00.004-06:00

It's hard to believe that after last semester and the humbling and breathtaking success that it brought has come and gone, I'm nearly 1/3 done with a subsequent semester. On-campus interviewing has been going well. Getting the chance to get to know other attorneys in Baton Rouge who can joke about the "a fortiori" argument from Traditions class and to actually understand what they're talking about when they say they're trying to leap over the federal subject matter jurisdiction amount in question requirement for a case ...these things are rewarding.

Prof. Obligations is a favorite of mine. He expects you to be able to recite the facts of the cases in class; yet, he's a genuinely kind man, rewarding you with a smile and a nod of affirmation when you perform. Obligations, thus far, seems just to be a more cranial approach to the theory of contracts. The notable difference seems to be that we can make Great Uncle Fred's promise to give a gift enforceable, unlike the other 49 states, as long as Uncle Fred got a notary and two witnesses to sign the donation document.

Prof. Con Law runs a tight ship. Involving "stand and deliver" case recitation, it really is a class that makes you think on your feet. It's a class that squeezes the apathy out and replaces concern over such previously unthought-of questions as whether or not the Article III "case or controversy requirements" necessarily demand that the Supreme Court never issue an advisory opinion. Con Law is a class that has grown on me, a growth that is analgous to some point on a continuum between the growth of a young seed into a beautiful tree and the growth of an ingrown toenail. [pause for polite chuckling and other forms of laughter] All humour[s] aside, when I think of the democractic process and think of the power of the people to have created and later amend the Constitution, I cannot help but subscribe to the "Who's Ya Daddy" theory of law.

Prof. CivPro has become a legend in my book. 'Nuff said. And, of course, he teaches on such wonderful subject matter [jurisdiction]. It's no secret that all law students aspire to one day practice in the area of Civil Procedure.

Prof. L.R.&W. is teaching us how to write appellate briefs and conduct appellate oral arguments. My assignment this semester is to destroy a noncompetition agreement that my "client" signed, claiming that public policy, statutory construction and jurisprudential rulings demand that this agreement be nullified.

Prof. ACJ is teaching us about the police function and Constitutional limits on police behavior. We get to ponder on such questions as whether it violates a defendant's 4th Amendment rights for a policeman in a chopper to hover at 400 feet and look into the defendant's greenhouse, to obtain probable cause for issuance of a warrant to search aforementioned weedhouse...I mean greenhouse...for Mari J. This is probably my favorite class to read for. The recurring question becomes, "Should the criminal go free [and the evidence obtained unconstitutionally be suppressed] just because the constable has blundered?" Surprisingly, I find myself answering yes a few times, though I remain unyieldingly conservative in many cases.

Prof. Property, who called on me the first day of class, is probably the fastest talker in the Southeast. But she is also passionate about her area of knowledge and gives thorough lectures. Property is a very interesting area of law that involves study of a lot of "technical" rules and fact scenarios with regard to, for example, the navigability of lakes and rivers and whether or not a chandelier is a component part of a building such that under the Civil Code it must be included in the sale of a home. If there was ever a course that made me want to get my civil code autographed, it's this one. By Prof. Carroll. And of course, Prof. Yiannopoulous.

With that said, hopefully I'll be back before the end of the semester to blog again.
And hopefully it will be something actually interesting to the masses of humanity.

Law Professor Quote of the Day...Month...Year

2009-01-30T08:49:00.000-06:00

"Why was there chicken wire around the marijuana? To keep deer out! You don’t want to see Bambi running around out in the road looking like he’s been smoking cigars and drinking brandy at Churchill’s, talking bad about Joe Stalin and saying nice thinks about FDR!"

Anything Can Happen

2009-01-27T16:09:00.002-06:00

When it comes to dining at the spread of educational topics in law school, nothing is off limits. Though most days we get to make another notch under our desk for the umpteenth time we've encountered the word "reasonable" or one of its relatives, there are moments of surprise.

For example, in property law, today's reading and tomorrow's lecture involves a discussion of ownership and use rights of oxbow lakes.

The Hudson River Miracle

2009-01-16T10:28:00.002-06:00

The Story

Rule #12

2009-01-15T12:47:00.002-06:00

Be prepared to argue for people you don't want to.

A semester-along assignment in one class is to craft an appellate argument. Each of us in class had to draw at random from a hat to decide which side of the case each of us would argue. I spent part of yesterday evening reading through the materials and then hoping that I got to argue the appellee's side. She's a much more reputable character in my mind. And lo and behold, I randomly select the appellant, instead. My heart sank. I have to represent that chick? The one who received a benefit from someone and then threw it back in their face? Who won who used and then abused? And yet, she may have a valid legal case. I suppose you have to love law and order in the abstract to be in the business...or else lose all sentiments of what is right and good and just argue because you are told to, like a war machine...or some mixture of both.

Dante's Inferno

2009-01-07T00:55:00.008-06:00

Though Dante Aligheri's The Divine Comedy was apparently more of a political satire than an intended primer of spiritual truths, the Christian can read the work and find some stunning truths. Aligheri apparently at least had a knowledge of his Bible, and in the first of the three books, Inferno, the pilgrim's descent into Aligheri's hell makes some profound and, I found, often true statements about divine justice and the path to redemption.

Midway along the journey of our life I woke to find myself in a dark wood, for I had wandered off from the straight path...How I entered there I cannot truly say, I had become so sleepy at the moment when I first strayed, leaving the path of truth... Canto I, 1-3; 10-12

There is so much truth in this. When any one of us falls prey to sin, and we continue therein, it eventually becomes impossible to recall the moment when we first turned from truth. Often times, we wake up one day and realize our lives are far from what God planned for us. And what a frightful realization!

I am the way into the doleful city, I am the way into eternal grief, I am the way to a forsaken race. Justice it was that moved my great Creator; divine omnipotence created me, and highest wisdom joined with primal love. Before me nothing but eternal things were made, and I shall last eternally. Abandon every hope, all you who enter. The Gate of Hell, Canto III, 1-9
O Highest Wisdom, how you demonstrate your art in Heaven, on earth, and here in Hell! How justly does your power make awards! Canto XIX, 10-12

What can I add! Woe unto our modern American Christian churches, that a fourteenth century poet preaches more truth than we do! There cannot be good without evil, heaven without hell. How can a loving God create hell? God is loving, but he is also just.

...When, from the mountain's top where the slide began to the plain below, the shattered rocks slipped down, shaping a path for a difficult descent--" Canto XII, 7-9

As the pilgrim descends into the lower levels of Hell, he comes across a steep and shattered terrain caused by Christ's descent into Hell. I love this imaginative description of the Bible's declaration that Jesus descended into Hell and reclaimed the keys of death and Hell from Satan. The poet portrays Christ's descent having altered the very course of the fiery landscape.

Who could, even in the simplest kind of prose describe in full the scene of blood and wounds that I saw now--no matter how he tried! Certainly any tongue would have to fail: man's memory and man's vocabulary are not enough to comprehend such pain. Canto XXVIII, 1-6

As the pilgrim views each contrapasso, he becomes more and more horrified at the punishments he views. But in Canto XXVIII, he is utterly stricken with grief at viewing souls that are ripped open from mouth to loins, with entrails spilling out. They are the sowers of discord. This ghastly description makes me think about what our foul deeds must smell of to a righteous God.

I do not revel in such readings, but I am moved to consider my ways (see Haggai 1:7) and am brought to gratefulness that "He hath made Him to be sin for us, who knew no sin" (II Cor. 5:21), that Christ has taken our punishment upon Himself.

2009 A.D.

2009-01-07T00:33:00.004-06:00

Happy New Year.

Some thoughts...

Denver//After San Diego, we spent a few days in Denver. This being the third year I spent with the Denverian relatives, I've begun to feel like a regular user of party favors and new year cheers at the Porter residence. It was wonderful seeing them, as always. This was the first time I've been there and there was no snow on the ground. Boohoo.

Old Folks//We visited some of my Dad-in-law's elderly relatives in the nursing home. I just wanted to hug those old ladies over and over again. And they would take all the affection we had to offer. One aunt reminded us over and over again, "I'd never thought it'd be like this" (referring to the limitations and loss incurred by old age). A sovereign plea they made to us to remember to treasure the time that is given to us. I love the old folks; I want to be loved when I join the club one day.

Marley & Me//Great movie, though it warranted a higher rating for suggestive references and I do not think parents should take their kids to see it, ironically enough. The cute but outrageous dog serves merely as a plot device to show the life cycle of Owen Wilson and Jennifer Aniston's marriage: the wedding day, the start-up careers, attempts to overcome infertility, suddenly having too many kids, wife's postpartum depression, marital strife, career changes, etc. A very thought provocative and heartfelt movie for those thinking about starting a family (i.e. getting married), it almost made me teary-eyed. (For what it's worth, I've only heretofore cried during war movies and The Passion.)

Murder Mysteries//I'd never heard of this before, either, except for the times Amanda told me it might be a good idea. A great way to spend New Year's Eve, we all played this prepackaged game in which each of us was a character and had to solve a whodunnit. Filled with a dead defense program worker, FBI investigations, crack dealers, KGB agents, jealous lovers, and other colorful characters, a great mind exercise and way to pass the time.

Grades Are In//Glory to GOD.

Year in Review//Enjoy.

San Diego

2008-12-31T18:37:00.001-06:00

With my first semester of law school done, I had a few days to catch up on what I had missed over the past four months: visiting with my family, painting doors for pay at their house, Guitar Hero and Halo 2 at my friend’s place, oil changes for the cars, balancing the checkbook, buying Amanda a Christmas present, dinner at the infamous Dills and a few other niceties. And then I embarked on a long road trip: 1.5 hours from Baton Rouge to Slidell for a day with the family; the next day a 7 hour trip from Slidell to Houston; and then several hours later at 4:00 a.m., a 24-hour trip by car (with Dad Mautz driving) from Houston to San Diego.

That car ride was a dream. The first few hours were literally spent in dreams. Amidst my Bible, Andrew Murray’s Absolute Surrender, Dante Aligheri’s Inferno, a Making of New Surrender Anberlin DVD, chess with Amanda on my laptop, Cinderella and Madagascar on David’s laptop, many snacks, various catnaps, 800 miles / 13 hours of Texas, various views of breathtaking desert and mountain ranges, passing through El Paso, New Mexico and Arizona, poking Amanda and aggravating her more like a brother than a husband, and trying to shift my buttocks regularly out of discomfort and boredom, I made the trek while W.A.M., my daring father-in-law, drove the 24 hour drive, with occasional help from my mother-in-law.

Arrival that early morning in California started a chain of events that has been simply wonderful. When I first met Amanda’s extended family a couple years ago, I had those heebie-jeebie jitters of wanting to make a good impression and being scared of saber-toothed in-laws with 20 Questions ready to pounce. By last Christmas, though, I had felt like part of the family. This Christmas, I really have begun to experience the sheer joy of being part of a new family. Honestly, when I think of all the jokes that my superiors have made over hating visiting in-laws during holidays, I am enraged. My experience has been that visiting in-laws is a pleasure. I guess, I should realize that I am blessed with great in-laws who are loving, caring and welcoming.

Aunt Michelle and Uncle Jeff, who graciously welcomed me into their home, along with their adorable children Ryan and Kayla, have been a portrait of warmth and hospitality. Grandpa and Grandma Cheryl have really become like a new set of grandparents to me. Raising my voice to make myself heard to Grandpa reminds me of that special way I communicate with my other grandpapas, and feel like a little boy just begging Grandma Cheryl to tell another story in her eager and jovial manner. Amanda’s little cousins are adorable. They’re about the same ages as my two youngest siblings. Seeing little Kayla dance around just like my little sister Jessica dances around in pretty dresses. I definitely hope Amanda and I have a little girl.

The first night we drove into California, I knew I was going to love it there. The lights beckoned from terraces that seemed to ascend the landscape in steps. The morning did not fail to deliver. I fell in love with San Diego as soon as I walked outside. The clean, dry air. The rolling landscape with lush vegetation and various rock formations, cacti, palm trees and beautiful flowers. The neighborhoods with curious rock gardens and terraced levels of ascent. The Pacific Ocean…

Pacific Ocean, ah. The water was freezing. I couldn’t help but avail myself of the opportunity to show my new family that I aspire to the Polar Bear Club. I have now swum in 3 of the 4 oceans. In 2005 I swam in the Indian Ocean off the coast of South Africa. In 2007 I swam in the Atlantic Ocean off the coast of New Jersey. And now, like Balboa discovering the Pacific Ocean, I body surfed in those waters in what may be America’s greatest city, San Diego. Wait, did I just imply that Balboa body surfed when he laid eyes on that blessed sea? C’mon. You know he did; this is not revisionist history.

And the Zoo…where do I begin? 12 meercats posing, 11 koalas munching, 10 flamingos fighting, 9 relatives gazing, 8 giraffes necking, 7 bears roaming, 6 big cats sleeping, 5—hours—of fun, 4 orangutans, 3 elephants, 2 polar bears, and a partridge in a…nope, that last one is not certifiable. Know that I am very happily attached to our Audubon Zoo in N’awlins, Louisiana, so when I say that the San Diego Zoo is superior I aim to say that I was highly impressed.

Christmas Day. Wow, how wonderful! It began at the crack of dawn. From 7:00 a.m. to 11:30 a.m. the presents flowed like water that Jehovah caused to flow from the rock at Rephidim. Amanda’s parents, her grandparents, and her aunt and uncle lavished us. I got running shoes, a new sweater, tool kit… My sweetie got me a new pocket knife. After rocking out a little “Raining Blood” on GH3 before I knew it, Christmas dinner was ready. After ham and such, we all opened our little secret gift boxes next to our plates and read all the nice and crazy things we had written to each other. Uncle Jeff confirmed that I am fairly attractive via checking the box next to “yes” rather than “no” or “maybe” on my note, though he wrote to Amanda that we were like Beauty and the Beast, with myself being the latter, I’m afraid. After a little Apples to Apples with Uncle Jeff lobbying for his choices…and winning…a little Dark Knight finished the night in style. Of course, I couldn’t get off that easy. Several people had to take a turn asking me a “law” question since I’m a budding law student and obviously know the answer to all of your legal questions, from Assault and Battery to Yodeling and Zebras. To quote Prof. Traditions, “Zebra Law.” Wha?!

El veintiseis de deciembre. I was somehow not surprised to learn that Shamu the x-teenth is still alive and well at Sea World. As cold weather with frosty winds unusual for San Diegans continued, we spent the day watching dolphins do backflips, sea lions give people in wetsuits high fives with their flippers, killer whales push their trainers two stories into the air, and the many other shows that Sea World is famous for. The Shamu show was curiously titled “Believe,” and with music throughout and philosophical musings woven into the trainers’ sporadic oral communication, the experience felt like some sort of religious service with whale riders. I quote, “All things are possible if you believe.” With the spiritual foundation laid in my life, I could not help but recall Jesus’ words, that with God all things are possible. Regardless of the eccentric angle from which these fishy preachers were approaching the subject, I could not help but silently glorify God thinking of the magnificence of intelligence that was displayed before me in these stunningly beautiful creatures. Creatures that somehow were graceful and cunning enough that someone long ago hypothecated whales with intelligence sufficient to be trained to interact with human beings as though they belong to us, or us to them. Though I know man alone is created in the image of God, the fact that there is some sort of bridge of communication that can link a whale brain with a human mind has sent me into a bit of an inquisitive reverie. Notwithstanding, the highlight of the day was seeing a sea otter walk on two feet and carry a Pepsi Cola can to a thirsty trainer. Nor had I ever before seen the gloriously spotless white Beluga whale before. Nor had I grasped the jaws of a sting ray before. Nor had I witnessed the graces of the lettuce-eating (and endangered) Manatee in underwater flight. Spontaneous joys such as these proved ultimately more rewarding than other niceties like the lackluster sight of sharks lazily floating around and the “Journey to Atlantis” rollercoaster ride. Though seeing my wife giggle and scream as we were soaked on the coaster was worth it all.

One day we played our own version of The Amazing Race. There were two teams. The Silver Bullets: Aunt Michelle, Grandpa, Amanda, Ryan, Mom and me. The Wall-Es: Uncle Jeff, Grandma Cheryl, David, Valerie, Kayla, and Dad. We had roughly 15 clues that led us around San Diego, some requiring that we perform certain tasks along the way. One clue led us to a beach full of seals. Another led us to the highest points in San Diego, including Mt. Soledad and the hill with the lighthouse. Other sites included the world-famous Coronado hotel and Belmont Park, where we had to get out and ride the rollercoaster. The race ended when we had to take a trolley across town and jump into Aunt Michelle’s vehicle. We called it a tie in the end, as the Bullets pulled into the finish line only seconds before the Wall-Es. Aunt Michelle and Uncle Jeff put a ton of work into creating all the clues for the game.

But it all came to a halt too quickly. As one of Amanda’s tender cousins held back tears, we all said goodbyes and piled back into the Suburban of Love, Peace, Equity, Unity and other Axiological Wonders. We are still in that blessed place of package and person-crammed bliss as I speak, or rather, type. I will at last end this blog post because the glare of my laptop screen is preventing the Burban’s inhabitants from viewing the stars. And what a view. Much better than the pornographic and dust-filled Sodom and Gomorrah known as Las Vegas. As we slipped back into the majestic and looming mountain passes, this time in the surprisingly beautiful Utah, my thoughts once again return to the degree to which mankind has effaced what is good and right in the world through erecting idolatrous edifices in the middle of the desert (i.e. Vegas). By the time the sun rises, we’ll be over the Rocky Mountains, spending our last few days of holiday in Denver, Colorado.

Divine Judgment

2008-12-16T20:51:00.002-06:00

In the latest of the the unfolding saga that is the American economy being brought to its knees, state governments are now imposing a tax iPods.

The Jellied Gasoline Monologue

2008-12-12T23:04:00.007-06:00

Jesus, your grace. My, do I have some blogfessions to make. I'm taking a great risk here. But I have to document the truth so I can read my blog years later and remember my initial thoughts upon leaving my first semester of law school finals.

I cannot remember the last time I felt at ease. I feel somewhat at ease now, but just like falling in love, it feels like the first time. It's really only been two to three weeks total that I've been in the 'Nam...I mean, the exam, eh, study mode. But I found that a couple short weeks of daily rigor can change a life...with a surprising degree of permanence.

Don't get me wrong. I'm not scarred for life. However, my once lazy behind now knows the meaning of a hard day's work. And pleasure is that much sweeter tonight because it almost feels earned.

I have to thank my professors. For every time in the past couple weeks that I lay down and could not sleep. The elements of various crimes and tort recovery theories, the various lists of memorized policy factors, the many Latin interpretative methodology nomenclatures, and various minimum contacts standards espoused in personal jurisdiction cases. I dreamed about them. I told my wife about them. Thank you for helping me reach a state of concentration that heretofore had been only an ephemeral possibility.

When I sat down to write my first four-hour exam, my hand was tremulous. I couldn't believe that I was about to be subjectively evaluated on the past 4 months of work. It didn't matter that I studied the law 50-60 hours per week, faithfully without fail. The professor would make the determination of whether this was adequate, based upon the 4 hours that lay ahead of me. One hour per month was all I had. Every hour that passed was a lost chance at explaining a month's worth of material. That exam was Legal Traditions and Systems. I was tested on Roman legal history, Louisiana Civil Code juridical relations, interpretative methodology and a host of other random subjects compressed into one course. I left feeling exhausted but surprisingly positive.

During my next exam, Civil Procedure, I felt myself a little more miserable, but used to it. I left the exam in shambles. I went through a brief period of convincing myself I'd flunked. The more I thought about it, I realized that it was out of my control. It's in Prof. CivPro's hands. And he's in God's hands.

Having vowed at the end of the Civ Pro exam to attack contracts with a vengeance, by the time the third exam started, I had revised my study strategy and like a mad man, taken to not only memorization of theories but also memorization of intended answer structures. I decided to let it all hang out. I left feeling that I punched a hole in the exam.

At the start of my torts exam, seating myself with my Exam4 software open and my emergency power bar on the desk, I felt like I was through. After two weeks of monastic seclusion and emotional drought, I cared more than ever about the result. Three hours later I didn't know what I had done. I had written so much that the software told me I had reached the maximum word limit and needed to open a new file. What ensued was something in between the zenith of pandemonium and childish hilarity as I ran around trying to desperately locate an IT guy to help me start a new exam file. The techie told me that in his years at the law center, he had only had one or two other students write that much. I felt like something between a freak and the kid from The Sword and the Stone.

Entering my criminal law exam, I felt so tired. I almost felt apathetic. But once I read the exam, I came alive and wrote. And wrote and wrote. And actually felt I was having fun. I felt myself running out of issues and enjoyed it so much I dredged the bottom of my mind's ocean, closed my eyes and perused my mental outline again for more information. Leaving the law center this evening, it couldn't have been more anti-climactic. With a slight cough at the thought of having finished, I emptied my locker and drove home.

I hardly know what to do with my time. I'm so happy...I think. I keep trying to imagine tomorrow. A tomorrow in the sunshine. A tomorrow outside of the library? Unthinkable. I try and imagine this brave new world outside of academia and theory. Hopefully I won't be like Dustin Hoffman at the end of Papillon. No, I am better than that. There is a return to the land of the living.

Describe "law school finals" in one word? Marathon.

I don't know if it's possible to ever love law school again, if law school ever was lovable. But the reason I know I'm on the right track is that "standing atop a stack of smoldering finals and papers" (S. Berry), I love the law. It's a beautiful thing. I think it's because I love principles so much. Its harmony. Its internal unity.

And one other thing. I love the smell of napalm in the morning. Smells like...victory.

Rule #11

2008-12-05T18:02:00.002-06:00

If you've got the will power, do not talk to students after an exam. Leave. Don't look back.

Of course, to discover that this is a rule, I first had to violate it. And I found out all the supposed things I "missed" during the exam. I felt myself working up a little sweat and went and sat down a bit and thought about it. Upon reflection, I don't even know that what those other students said is correct. The professor is the grader, not the students, in any case.

2 down, 3 to go. I'm in the process of dusting myself off from this one. Contracts, I'm coming for you...with a vengeance!

Thanksgiving Hymn

2008-11-27T19:09:00.003-06:00

For a lady who loves and supports me heart and soul.
For a father who has worked past exhaustion to clothe and feed me.
For a mother who cooked hot meals for me for two decades.
For a mind that is functional.
For a body free of genetic defects.
For eyes that see.
For ears that hear.
For a mouth that sings and speaks.
For a filled stomach.
For shoes without holes.
For a country that recognizes natural and extra-patrimonial rights.
For a peace that surpasses understanding.
For a world in living, breathing colors.
For a heart that beats without my effort.
For little sisters that have grown up to be beautiful and godly.
For younger brothers that are strong and mature.
For various sounds somehow arranged to make music.
For a sun that rises and sets every day.
For the rain that falls on the just and the unjust.
For the miracle of language.
For the faith of children.
For new mercies every morning.
For a chance at life.
For the sorrowful and joyous passion of the only Son of God.

Thanksgiving and praise. Glory in the Highest. To Yeshua my Messiah.

Of Late

2008-11-25T13:16:00.004-06:00

A stranger shrouded in a dark robe
Followed me home yesternight
And pulling his darkened cloak
Around his head he thickly asked,
Demanded an account of how I spend my time these days.

Unsuspicious of his masked visage
I began with haste to relate
How strange adventures had come
And swept me off into a myriad
Of thoughts and dreams that demanded of me answers I knew not.

"Though dark have been my dreams of late,"
I said, "I dream not upon my bed
But to seek the light at the end
Of this portal into the new world
Where rules are made only to be excepted and excused by merely mortal reason."

Whether he seemed satisfied
With my accounting for the seconds
And the hours I have not attempted
To tally while wandering in this strange
And familiar land, I know not, but he asked if I was satisfied.

Not wanting to anger his dismal personage
I whispered that I had no time
To be fraught with care or concern
Over such an ephemeral quest as satisfaction
When the untamed beast before me requires attention to every quiver of muscle and bone.

Welcome to the Hall of the Presidents

2008-11-11T15:13:00.002-06:00

I have nothing to say about President-Elect Barack Obama's views on "the War," taxes, environmental policy, or foreign doctrine. Nor would I like to raise a race issue. I would like to weave the words of a radical follower of Jesus.

I have opinions about many things, like most people. These opinions certainly extend to "the War," taxes, the environment, and foreign policy. But as a Christian, I must ask myself where my ultimate allegiance lies. Can I vote for someone because it will best economically suit me, or help me avoid going to war, or maybe even give me a better quality of life?

No, I cannot, I will not, I dare not.

See Psalm 139:14-16 and Jeremiah 1:5 for the divine declaration that a fetus is a living human being loved by God. As such, any killing of such a living human being under the banner "abortion," "choice," or any other designation is sinful. I cannot support someone who wishes to not only legally expand such killings, but also use my own money to fund them.

Why not? What about my own opinions about other "important" "issues"?

My response is Luke 12:23ff: Life is more than food; the body is more than clothing. Do not seek for how to feed yourself and provide for yourself; for the nations of the world seek these things, but your Father in heaven already knows you need these things. Seek the kingdom of God and all these things will be added to you.

Christians who put earthly concerns over the Kingdom of Heaven, we are to blame for the current state of affairs in this nation: See article, "Evangelicals Responsible for Obama Victory".

I Surrender

2008-11-06T19:46:00.003-06:00

Okay. You win, Common Sense. You have triumphed, O illustrious Necessity. I will hearken to your voice. Though till now I have written a formal case brief for every single, solitary, little case I have read in my substantive law classes until now, against the advice of others, in the face of not being able to get the readings done, in the hopes of being able to say, "I BRIEFED FOR THE WHOLE FIRST SEMESTER!", I will now only do book briefs. The professors are making us read more than ever, I have a federal memorandum due next week, our study group will not meet four days per week, and I am taking 10 practice exams over the next two weeks. There is simply no utility in case briefing any more. I will not be like a hypothetical man, who, enamored with his eating utensil, continues to press the fork into his mouth repeatedly, although the food on the plate is gone, causing bleeding of the gums and vomitorious impulses in the back of the throat.

Farewell, oh life of briefing every case. I shall not miss you. Not very much. Not a whole lot. Only a little. Well, actually, I might wonder why I'm not briefing any more. Do I have to stop? Define common sense again, please?

Los Sabados

2008-10-26T18:37:00.002-05:00

Sleeping in till almost 10:00 a.m.
Cooking a three course brunch and eating it with my wife.
An afternoon in "Death Valley" at a Tiger Stadium football game.
An evening dinner and fellowship with friends, including talk of healing, The Silmarillion, and faraway places.
And playing a co-op campaign with a friend, scrambling for Covenant energy swords with which to slay fierce honor guards in the video game Halo 2.

That's what I love about Saturdays.
The one that just happened, anyway.

Rule #10

2008-10-21T14:46:00.004-05:00

If after struggling with how a particular case fits into a certain test or theory yields repeated failed attempts at reconciliation, you are probably trying to fit a square peg into a round hole.

Example:
I struggled with Jenkins v. St. Paul for several weeks. This was the case that I actually woke up thinking about one morning. I literally, as the alarm went off, rolled over and started resuming my prior evening thoughts about the case. The case is one in which an attorney fails to file a client's underlying case within the prescriptive period, causing the client's case to "die," resulting in legal malpractice. The client sues the attorney for negligence. In order for the client to recover damages, the attorney's negligence has to be the actual cause of the client's harm. The client's harm is the failed lawsuit. Using the "but-for" actual causation test, the client recovers nothing. "But-for the attorney negligence, the harm still may have occurred because the client's underlying case was faulty." However, in the realm of actual causation, there is a second test, the "substantial factor" test, that may allow a showing of causation. Using substantial factor, if the negligent act and another force operate independently and either could have caused the harm, the negligent act can still be found to be a substantial factor in bringing about the harm, and thus be the "actual cause."

In Jenkins, my reasoning was that either of the 2 separate forces [(1) the client's underlying faulty suit and (2) the attorney's negligent malpractice] could have brought about the failed lawsuit, so the malpractice could be the actual cause. Yet, this case rejects that result and simply shifts the burden to the attorney to prove that the underlying case would have failed, even if he had filed the suit within the prescriptive period.

After trying to reconcile the substantial factor test with this result for weeks, I finally asked this question and Prof. Torts simply said, "I think you're over-analyzing this," and advised that Jenkins is an exception to the normal causation rules.

Exception. It's a dirty word, but one whose significance I apparently failed to realize.

Rule #9

2008-10-09T21:26:00.004-05:00

9: Realize the underlying, inherent value in the several learning processes, not being distracted by their superficial, apparent value.

It makes the learning processes more effective.

9.1 Study Group - Actually, the apparent value is not even clear at this point, but if there is an apparent value, it is actually learning something new through group synergy. The real value, though, is just verbalizing the things one has been learning and becoming aware of things that one has learned but may not even be aware of.

9.2 Class - It's not about writing down everything the professor says. Maybe not even writing down much of it at all. Class is about learning to think like a lawyer. It's not necessarily about being vocal, either. Even if the professor is not asking you a question, answer the question presented in your own mind and see how your answer compares with the correct one.

9.3 Reading - Remembering every fact the court opinion presents is the fastest road to the Ecclesiastical "vanity of vanities." Rather, don't just see the court's answer to the legal issue, but see the underlying reasoning of how the judges got there: the statutory interpretation, the analogies included, the policy questions answered. Just "doing" the reading might have been okay to fool your elementary school teacher. And trying to remember every detail you read may have been okay when you actually used to read sci-fi novels recreationally. But that won't do you any good here.

9.4 Outlining - Perhaps, the biggest deception here is that the finished product, the outline itself, is important. Why outline when there are free outlines floating around? Sure, organization of one's notes into comprehendable form is praiseworthy. But the real value is that outlining forces a systematization and rationalization of concepts learned. In law school, knowing isolated and random facts will tend to do more harm than good. The only good comes from synthesis. You know it all, or you don't know anything at all. And outlining can literally give a law student something to live for. With little real and tangible output during the first semester, producing outlines can give one the satisfaction of seeing the product of the academic toil that undisputedly provides constant companionship for the first semester 1L.

LSU Law Classroom Moment of the Day

2008-10-09T13:04:00.002-05:00

[The students all nod in response to a question asked by a professor.]

"All of you who are nodding your heads assertively, stop it."

Slow Down, Cool Off, the Law Thing Has Gotten a Little Out-of-Hand

2008-10-02T15:08:00.003-05:00

At a soccer game last night, as I watched a player get bumped to the ground by another player, I instinctively yelled, "BATTERY!" and then mumbled to myself, "But there is a legal defense of consent." What was I even doing at a soccer game mid-week, anyway? I'm in law school!

The first thing on my mind this morning when I woke up one minute before the alarm went off was Jenkins v. St. Paul Fire and Marine Insurance. On my mind in the sense that I immediately started thinking about the logic underlying the case.

Last night as I went to bed, I half-dreamily began seeing Prof. Civpro asking, "Now, what did the defendant do in or with the forum?" I confessed this to a classmate today, and he responded that that is a good thing. That probably means you'll do well on the exam, he suggested. That's not to mention the fact that I've fallen asleep muttering Latin phrases before.

Prof. Torts summed it up well today when someone in class complained something along the lines of, There aren't enough hours in the day to read all this junk, outline my notes, brief the cases, and come to class. Prof. Torts indicated that we're actually going to double the amount of pages we've been reading per night. With a smile, he intimated that we would have to make trade-offs and decide how to study, adding, "Welcome to law school."

---

Don't worry. I'm not as wigged-out as this journal entry sounds. I just love dry humour.

The Horror

2008-09-30T10:34:00.003-05:00

A man punches his ex-wife's abdomen repeatedly to bash the life out of the a baby in utero. Ford Motor Company is labeled by a professor as a "good corporate citizen" for performing a cost-benefit analysis comparing probable burn deaths in manufacturing the Ford Pinto to the cost of adding a safety device to prevent accidents. A woman sues a man who committed adultery to have a relationship with her because he broke a promise to care for her after having cheated on his own wife.

How does this affect me as a Christian? Is law school taking its toll on spirituality?

I am not afraid of losing my faith in humanity, as one of peers said he is. I have, by definition, lost my faith in humanity. What I have lost finitely, I have gained infinitely. In refusing faith in the fundamental goodness of human beings, I have gained faith in the ultimate and exclusive goodness of God.

And I am mindful that the law of man and law of God are two separate things. The human law is only an attempt to appropriate divine law. It sometimes succeeds at this appropriation and usually fails. This is fine with me. It is simultaneously troubling, for I am a stranger and pilgrim in this land. As G.K. Chesterton said, I am "astonished, yet at home."

As a law school graduate and friend put it the other day, the study of law is a study of the failure of grace.

Socratize Me

2008-09-23T15:53:00.002-05:00

I remember reading a Louisiana Bar Association pamphlet during law school orientation. Meant to, in theory, assuage any concerns an incoming 1L student might have, the pamphlet actually scared me silly. It referred to something known as the “Socratic Method,” which, the pamphlet promised, would become something I would develop a perverse enjoyment for, if I believe that what doesn’t kill me can make me stronger [italics meant to be a paraphrase]. How encouraging.

My fellow 1Ls agree that Prof. Crimlaw’s teaching method most resembles what we had understood to be the Socratic Method. I had been dreading getting “called on” by Prof. Crimlaw for this reason. Well, it happened today. And he didn’t even call me by my correct name, at first.

What ensued, though, was much better than what I had expected and more invigorating than I could have foreseen. With every proceeding question he asked, I found myself digging into the textbook, perusing my case brief, scraping the bottom of my mind to formulate something with which to answer him. It was an experience that caused my senses to be aroused to a heightened state, much like what I imagine Peter Parker experienced in Spiderman: the high school hallway scene where in one millisecond, he can perceive drops of sweat and buzzing flies, every minute detail around him. It amounted to a conversation between student and professor across the classroom, with an air of shouting match.

Call me Will Smith’s character in The Pursuit of Happyness, but this is a part of my life. And this part of my life, today, was called “pleasant surprise.” I seem to have had a positive experience with Socrates on the front-end of law school (whew!). Yet I am trying to not be self-deceived. As fellow classmate One Elle said, “Before the semester is over, all of us will fall flat on our face [in oral responses in class].” Mr. Elle has attended law school previously, unlike most of us, so I’ll take his word for it.

I Wiki-searched Socrates to figure out what the Socratic method is: “[A] series of questions are posed to help a person or group to determine their underlying beliefs and the extent of their knowledge. The Socratic method is a negative method of hypothesis elimination, in that better hypotheses are found by steadily identifying and eliminating those which lead to contradictions .” ”Socrates,” Wikipedia. Of course, as my dad, an attorney who is “proof that there is life after law school” reminds me, one shouldn’t worry about professors’ fascination with Socratization. After all, Dad reminds me, “You know what they did to Socrates? They made him drink poison!”

But enough of that. I have some studying to do. And this is the part of my life I call … “outlining.”

More on that, later. As well as study groups.
P.S. Pardon the movie reference earlier. But that was a great movie my wife and I watched this weekend past. If I were to cry during a movie, The Pursuit of Happyness would be near the top of my list.

The Rules

2008-09-20T20:35:00.006-05:00

Rule #5: Do not write down everything the professor says.
Rule #6: Schedule one day on the weekend to avert your eyes from anything law-related.
Rule #7: Don't wear brightly colored shirts (e.g. yellow and pink) if you do not want to get called on.
Rule #8: Treat the experience as a full-time job with plenty of mandatory overtime, without monetary compensation.

Dear diary,
This was a rough week. In law school, you get do not have canceled classes. You have rescheduled classes. The many classes we missed during Hurricane Gustav week - we have to make all them up. And several of those occurred this past week. By the week-end, there is no desire to read left in me. Raised in a video-games-dull-the-brain household, I never before would have thought until now that buying an xBox is a legitimate business expense, related to maintaining sanity. I am glad I know where the feet of Jesus are, at His throne. Without Him, I would have lost my peace of mind this past week, and possibly even a piece of my mind. Still, the law is such a rewarding pursuit and fascinating love.
Oh and another thing. If my laptop computer would join Facebook, I would add him as a friend because he's a constant companion these days.

Mr. Clayton!

2008-09-10T15:32:00.003-05:00

In law school, "we don't like you enough to call you by your first names," one professor tells us.

That's why this same professor shouted out those two words that were my dread and every other Section One 1L's sigh of relief:

"MISTER CLAYTON!"

That's right, my first time being "called on," as we say in law school. Prof. Torts, thankfully. Torts, my favorite subject. Not sarcastically; truly my favorite subject. I got to have a chat about Herrin v. Sutherland and Compuserve v. Cyber Promotions. Thankfully, a positive first experience.

In the midst of today's novel experiences, I must relate to cyberworld a new rule I have learned this week from (thankfully) not my own, but other students' experiences:

Rule #4: Don't tamper with the professor's hypothetical or you may be subjected to great wrath. i.e., play the professor's game. If he/she says the facts of a "hypo" are such and such and asks you what the result is, don't ask a counter-question adding additional facts. A professor's hypothetical is his/her intellectual property. And while it might not be legally protected, you may want to obtain legal protection before tampering with it.

Whyyouwannakillmeh?

2008-09-09T19:25:00.002-05:00

Although I loved The Dark Knight, I can't help but wonder, with many other critics, why Bruce Wayne had to destroy his voice by talking in such guttural tones. Please enjoy the following hilarious video on this subject matter: "What's Up With the Dark Knight's Voice?"

Staff of the Gods...Broken

2008-09-08T15:30:00.003-05:00

One week since I have last blogged, Hurricane Gustav has come and gone. It has been said that Hurricane Katrina devastated southeastern Louisiana, Hurricane Rita desolated southwestern louisiana, and Hurricane Gustav went and claimed the area between the Katrina and Rita. That is a fairly accurate description in my mind, which means that the center went near my own city, Baton Rouge. And the sights around Baton Rouge are disconcerting. Still, Gustav (which means "Staff of the Gods") was much less fierce upon landfall that had originally been predicted. Even in the midst of such natural destruction, the mercy of God is revealed.

Amanda and I got to experience the surprising joy of "contraflow" on I-55 North to Memphis, Tennessee. In other words, both sides of the interstate highway were directed north. It was a bit shocking and confusing to see traffic on the other side of the highway moving in the same direction as me.

We were with my immediate family and grandparents in Memphis for several days. Other than a somewhat threatening conversation with a drunk-as-a-skunk bum in downtown Memphis, the visit was agreeable enough. It was certainly a blessing to be able to escape Baton Rouge while the storm came through with its wrath...

We returned to find our apartment unscathed (alleluia!). But we found Baton Rouge experiencing something I doubt it has experienced before. Several days after the storm, much of the city was still without power; no stores were open; lines for gas were (in some places I heard) measured in fractions of miles; traffic was in gridlock; power lines, trees and debris were strewn everywhere; and the city was under an eight o'clock curfew. On Saturday, Amanda and I went to volunteer with the Red Cross. We were given telephones and told to answer the deluge of calls incoming to the Baton Rouge Red Cross. We did this for 6 1/2 hours and heard many heartbreaking stories and did what we could. In spite of all this, our state received Divine mercy; it could have been much worse.

I am reminded of a massive cyclone that struck southeast Asia in Spring 2008, earlier this year. The nation of Myanmar lost over 80,000 people. Can we begin to fathom this, Americans? Westerners? Surely, the few that have perished in Hurricane Gustav...this is a tragedy. But let us remember that it is not nearly as catastrophic as what occurred in southeast Asia a few months ago: eighty-thousand souls perished. I worry that our country has no real mental grasp of the true meaning of suffering.

I also wish to admonish Christians reading this to thank the Son of God that you profess to serve. God taught my wife and I a lesson through all of this. On Saturday night, still without power, we had nothing to do in a dark apartment. But I knew that God is still worthy of honor, and my wife and I lit candles and began to kneel and thank God for all His blessings. Just as I was beginning to finally surrender my desperate want for electricity and begin to become enveloped in praise, Amanda started thanking God for the luxury of electricity. Seconds later, we heard a boom that I thought was a gunshot. I realized it was a transformer, for the lights suddenly flickered on.

Attitude of gratitude, folks. We may not have electricity, but some people have trees in their homes...or in their bones, in the worst of circumstances.

Speaking of Tortfeasors

2008-08-31T00:49:00.002-05:00

...there's one in the Gulf of Mexico called Gustav. And he's at fault. But he's not paying any monetary damages. He might cause some, though.

Amanda and I are bugging out Sunday morning and heading for the hills. Literally. And figuratively.

Psalm 121:1 I lift up mine eyes unto the hills. From whence cometh my help? My help cometh from the LORD, the maker of heaven and earth.

Stay safe, Baton Rouge.

Prof. Crimlaw vs. Prof. Torts: A Hypothetical

2008-08-29T14:34:00.001-05:00

Don't Beg For My Question. You Can't Have It.

2008-08-29T12:17:00.002-05:00

I, too, have been guilty!

Of what?

Of misunderstanding the phrase "beg the question." I would always hear the media and layperson on the street make such statements as, "It begs the question, 'Why do the Japanese disguise themselves as vending machines to escape would-be assailants?' " I wondered if that was correct, but accepted it as face value.

After hearing Professor Torts use the phrase in a negative light more than once (i.e., "Don't tell me that Mr. X, that's not a logical answer, it only begs the question!"), I decided to dig deeper.

Begging the question is a logical fallacy that asserts something is true just because it is. For example, "You can't deny that Yoplait Original Red Raspberry 99% Fat Free Yogurt is the tastiest yogurt because it's the best."

In other words, please don't beg for questions. Beg for answers. If you are hereafter told that someone or something begs the question, don't give in and agree that questions are pursued by beggardly entities.

I beg of you, if you have any questions about this post, please see the related links below.

Japanese Dress as Vending Machines to Ward Off Criminals

Begging for Actual Questions?

Rule #3

2008-08-27T20:32:00.002-05:00

Rule #3 (of law school)

Do not fear the Librarygeist.

Such a ghost does not exist.

I've been at my desk for 4 hours (with breaks here and there) and a girl from one of my classes nearly made me jump out of my skin when she suddenly appeared behind me to ask about the Contracts assignment.

I think I started not liking libraries when I saw the opening scene of Ghostbusters as a kid. But I must remember: the library is my friend. Although at this hour of night...

Rule #2

2008-08-27T15:35:00.002-05:00

Rule #2 of law school

Let there be moderatione in thy excitemente over knowledge apprehended in private studye.

In other words, in the midst of your monastic seclusion studying cases for the next day, you may be susceptible to great moments of self-fulfillment and joy, thinking to yourself, "Ha ha! I get it!" Beware because when you gleefully engage in discussion or listen to lecture on your supposed knowledge the next day, you may find the professor's understanding is vastly different, nay, exactly opposite to the profound revelation you experienced while studying in seclusion the day before.

Rejoice and be encouraged by thy intellectual zeniths, but be thou humble.

Consideration

2008-08-26T13:47:00.003-05:00

Generally speaking, if I gave you a gift, you would call me a nice guy. You might even say I am a considerate person. Likewise, you might say I was kind enough to show you consideration. In the law of contracts, giving a gift means that there is no consideration present.

What does showing consideration mean in a legal context? Well, first of all, consideration is not shown to someone; it's given. The word is used in the context of "in consideration of your promise to do x, I will do y." Y may be an act, a forbearance from doing some act, a change in a legal relation, or a promise to do one of the three forementioned things in this sentence.

The idea is that courts will not just enforce just any old promise. If that were the case, my wife could sue me for not being home in time for dinner. (Although, in my case, she is much too kind to initiate such litigation.)

For the court to enforce a promise, there must be adequate consideration. In other words, the contract is seen as a "bargained-for" exchange. The promisor (guy making the promise) wants something the promisee (guy receiving the promise) has, and the promisee wants something the promisor has. Thus, the parties will create a contract to get what they want. Win-win scenario. ...Maybe.

Further, the making of the promise by the promisor must induce the furnishing of consideration, and the furnishing of the consideration by the promisee must induce the making of the promise.

This is more all-inclusive than one would think. For example, a century and a half ago, an old man promised his nephew to pay him a large sum of money if he abstained from drinking, cursing, gambling and other vices until age 21. The lad performed said abstinence and recovered the money from his uncle. The court enforced this as a contract. The uncle made a promise to pay to induce certain consideration, namely the good moral behavior of the nephew. Likewise, the vice-free behavior of the nephew induced the uncle's promise.

There are situations where only one half of the equation is met. A grandfather once promised his granddaughter to pay her a regular income annually. His hope was that the money would allow her to not have to work. Not surprisingly, the girl quit her job and began living off the grandpappy's income, until grandpappy passed away and the executor of his will refused to keep paying the baby girl her free money. The court refused to enforce this as a contract. The promise made by the grandpappy induced the consideration, namely, the girl quitting her job. But her quitting the job did not induce the grandpappy's promise. The promise had already been made, regardless of whether she would then choose to quit her job, or not.

The flipside is also true: the courts will not enforce a contract in which the promise does not induce the consideration, even when the consideration induces the promise. For example, a rich papa once helped arrange financing for a son's start-up business. The son then promised to pay the father as a board member but later refused to pay his father and changed his own salary. When jaded, angry, and wrathful papa sued for breach of contract, the court held for the son. The papa's financing was consideration that induced the son's promise to pay him monetary dividends. But the son's promise did not induce the consideration; the papa's gratutitous gift pre-existed the son's promise.

What does the doctrine of consideration have to say about the our society's legal view of promises?

Promises are weighty, yes, and there is a moral duty to keep them. But we refuse to enforce promises that were made without each party really having an awareness of the bargain.

Of course, that doesn't take detrimental reliance and a host of other more modern contract theories that still might allow Baby Girl to recover money from Granddaddy. But that's what the rest of the semester is all about.

____

All that to say, Rule #1: In law school, you learn the rule. And that's it.
And then there's the exception to the rule. And that's it.
And then there's the exception to the exception. And that's it.
And then theres...

____

Tune in next time for "Rule #2"...

My, What a Large Pyramid!

2008-08-22T12:23:00.006-05:00

Getting to school at 8 am and leaving at 8 pm for several days in a row can have several effects.

For one, it tends to make me feel like a nocturnal creature. I get to the Paul M. Hebert LSU Law Center shortly after the sun has begun basking the world in its glow and finally leave the law library at day's end to find the sun has gone to bed. Does that make me Dracula, the Dark Knight, or just a raccoon? More than likely, I'll go with the raccoon option. I'm so hungry by that time of night, I'd dig through a trash can to find food.

Getting to the library an hour before class gives me a good opportunity to warm my legal brain up. Finish a little Roman history, perhaps...perform a few mental calisthenics - hypotheticals they're called...finish some case reading I didn't finish the night before. Whatever the case, there's a mass exodus from the library at 9 a.m. for class. And here we go again with Professor Criminal-law, C.L., for short. With esoteric questions of moral condemnability being hurled in our general direction with the rapidity of a fully-automatic firing weapon, we gaze forward in shock and awe at this academic performance. And we are engaged in it.

Perhaps, I just wanted to prove to myself and the class that Yes! my brain is grappling with legal issues as everyone else is. Or perhaps, I could not take the built-up pressure of having not been called on in any class yet - much like the pressure that a movie character feels to yell when hiding from a villain for a long period of time. Or perhaps, my breakfast just turned over a complete revolution in my stomach. Or perhaps, I really was offended by the notion that beyond a reasonable doubt would consist of not even having the thought for one second that the defendant is guilty.

Whatever the cause, I felt my hand yanked to the ceiling by some force within my body to argue and of course the Prof. C.L. pleasantly gestured toward me to speak. 60 seconds later, the Prof. and I had apparently had some sort of - intelligible? - exchange of ideas in which he claimed I had used the words "prolonged" and "abiding", which appeared written in green marker on the white board. All I could think to myself was, "Did I actually say that?" And to tell you the truth, I very wel may have. I just don't remember anything excep: (1) Right as 70 eyes turned to me - rather, 70 pairs of eyes = 140 eyes - I felt my throat invaded by the Sahara Desert and all of its aridity and (2) Realizing I was rambling, I suddenly stated "I feel as though I am rambling at this point and digging a hole from which there is no recovery" to everyone's nervous laughter.

And so goes the mystery of law school. Of being a "1L." I mean, "1L"? I know laywers are intellectual geeks, not creativity artists, but, "1L"? I feel like not only are we inmates, but inmates who don't even have differing identification numbers. We're all just "1L."

But the truth is, it's all very enjoyable. After several others classes in a day - including Prof. Torts tossing out hypotheticals involving smiling and benign people tossing buckets of acid on supposed friends - we come to the "end" of our day.

And then it begins. The hermitage begins. At least for me it does.

I find my cubby on the library 3rd floor and "dig in" like a soldier in the trenches. Or to use a different analogy, I enter the warm womb of intellectual thought and spend hours pouring over cases and theory and statutes to synthesizse something that I hope will actually be talked about in class the next day.

I know that one day I will begin blogging my thoughts on legal theory and such, but for now, Iam a foreigner in the land of Legal Thought, wandering with amazement, excitement, terror, and bewilderment among the pyramids, Great Sphinxes, psychedelic port-a-potties, and other ancient monuments.

"Let Us Suppose": Welcome to Law School

2008-08-19T15:38:00.004-05:00

I've been putting off my first 1L post with the pretense of "I'm too busy for that!" But as I sit here freezing on the desolate third floor of the library reading criminal law, I figure I'm due a short break. And a C.S. Lewis quote in a criminal law textbook? Let's say law school is not what one might expect.

But that's not totally true. As I did expect, the days are long, the reading material is dense as Cajun gumbo, and the professors are self-admitted masters of oratory. None of which I will refer to by name, nor any fellow students, for the sake of respecting their identities. For example, I would only refer to a consitutional law professor as "Professor Constitution."

Before my readership makes a mass exodus from this weblog, let me confirm that this is not going to strictly become a law school blog. It will simply become a mostly law school blog.

HA!

A friend advised me not to be "That Guy" in my classes. The student raving on about his knowledge of the homework or asking tangential questions that show his or her better-than-the-professor-knows-it knowledge of the material. I have certainly avoided that. I've actually only spoken up in one class a couple times, ever-so-briefly. Actually I wonder if the promised and unnerving Socratic Method is some sleeping giant that will suddenly be released from the dens of academia as of yet, for only a couple classes have employed the infamous law school calling-on of students.

Prof. Criminal Law, however, ironically was the one who told us he didn't use the Socratic Method (the Greeks eventually put Socrates to death, he reminded us, to nervous chuckles throughout the student stadium seating) - and then went on to question us more than any other professor. Actually I reviewed my notes, and I have only 2 typed pages of nothing but questions asked by the professor.

By the way, the other main characters in my evolving story will be Prof. Contracts, Prof. Torts, Prof. Civil-procedure, Prof. Legal-Traditions-and-Systems, and Prof. Legal-Research-and-Writing.

I could tell you more, but the truth is I'm still trying to figure out what's going on. I can tell you the reading is interesting. Very fulfilling.....and the hardest I've ever done. Well this end's my break.

Does anyone have a heating blanket? (I heard some chair-scooting. There must be other life forms up here on the 3rd floor.) "Utilitarianism and punishment of the innocent..."

Flight of the Tanooki

2008-08-14T17:02:00.003-05:00

One new t-shirt, one week, 3 hairstyles.

Clarification, hair growth shown in reverse order for exaggerational purposes. (Folks always said my hair grew fast...)

A Better Class of Criminal

2008-08-01T17:00:00.006-05:00

As far as my fairly comic-hero ignorant mind can tell, this is Batman's third major film outing. There was the laughable and cheesy 1960s television show, followed a couple decades later by a round of movies that were slightly more serious but still highly cheesy. With Christopher Nolan's Batman Begins (2005), Bruce Wayne's batsuit character took on a much darker and mature tone. With Nolan's latest, The Dark Knight, things don't lighten up; they just get heavier.

The question is not if, but when you should see this one in theaters. Have I ever actually coughed up the money to see a film in theaters not once, but twice? If so, I can't remember.

What's most impressive about The Dark Knight is the menacing and sickly fascinating Joker. Informing fellow mob bosses that he is the "chaos factor" and that Gotham deserves a "better class of criminal," the late Heath Ledger's character proves such a scary villain not merely because of spooky face paint, but more that he enjoys death and destruction for its inherent entertaining value. Perhaps this is most clear in such moments as the purple-robed clown torching millions of dollars of mob money to prove that accumulating filthy lucre is a sissy criminal's motivator.

In fact, the Joker is such an impressive and terrifying villain that the "light" emanating from the good guys in this film seems to be very dim indeed. If one were to confront moviegoers exiting the theater after watching this violent and hopeless flick, one could effortlessly convice them the film could have been just as easily been named "The Joker."

And the thing is, he always seems to win. Forget your good-will-triumph-over-evil-every-time superhero movie. The fact is, many people die and many criminals bask in impunity time and again, with relieving moments of Good trumping Evil interspersed through the 2 and a 1/2 hours of silver screen mayhem. But that's what makes a moralist rejoice. Despite evil on every side, the good guys are relentless in their stand, incorruptible...for the most part.

Aside from the Joker and his facial scars of dubious origin, other stand-outs include Lieutenant Gordon, the fancy-moustached man who is a pillar of integrity, quite possibly the strongest character in the film. Harvey Dent is the city attorney who awakens a sleeping giant through pursuing prosecution of dozens of wormy Gothamites involved in a money-laundering scheme of global proportions. Michael Caine's growing-ancient character gives plenty of thick-British-accented keen advice to Mr. Wayne at the moments it is needed most. And Morgan Freeman's character once again delivers as the man of mystery who is the firm and unyielding underbelly for all of the crazy Batmaniac inventions needed to fight back the mob demons loosed from the gaping mouth of comicbook antagonist hell.

And there's the main man. The man who can become the outcast, who can do the job that no one else wants to do because he can take it, as old man Alfred says. The hero Gotham deserves, but not the hero Gotham needs. The most glorious moment of the film, for me, comes when Bruce Wayne decides that Gotham does not need another hero, but rather someone to bear the brunt of the blame, so that the city's people will not lose hope in righteousness. As a Christian, this moment could not but remind me of a greater story in which an infinitely more worthy individual takes the blame for the entire world's sin, because that is what is needed for salvation, rather than a superhero tooting his own horn.

So what does this movie have? Appeal. Appeal that extends beyond geeky comic book infatuation. Intellect? Check. If you can decipher the money laundering scheme, you're one up on this accounting major. Action? Check. Nonstop, and well thought-out. Wait till you see the air rescue with the forked-nose aircraft, which actually was used by the American military in the Vietnam War. Character? Check. It's easy to see past the bullets, knives, and clown costumes to see raw humanity.

The one thing the movie may lack is a change of scenery. A location movie, this one's all about Gotham. You're looking at concrete and skyscrapers nonstop. The film was shot in Chicago, which seems fitting when one thinks of the prohibition-era mob wars circa 1930.

I think that The Dark Knight is about understanding. Learning to understand what truly motivates one's enemy. Learning one's own limitations. Understanding human fallibility. Understanding that though Evil may have a number of mini-triumphs, Good will ultimately triumph just because it's Good.

"Why so serious?" Jokerman asks? Because the film will leave you with a lot to ponder. And, perhaps, because a clown holding a knife to one's throat instantly slays any remaining shreds of belief in a happy and soaring comic book story.

Did I Just See a Tumbleweed Rolling By?

2008-07-21T19:31:00.020-05:00

As my friend, Recka, and I were moving approximately X pounds of weights in the weight room today, X being roughly equivalent to the variable satisfying the equation -7x + 283 = -417, I had a thought, it rolled by like a tumbleweed in my mind.

It's been 3 months now. There once was a time when this blog was such a part of me, or me a part of it, or my blog and I mutually cohabitating a conscious habitation of a whole person's thoughts, that person being me...

People would see me and say, "Bean! Good to see you're okay. You haven't blogged in awhile, and I was beginning to wonder if you were alright." Alas! for that day. If ever such a day did exist, I am exaggerating greatly.

FOUR YEARS! My blog and I have related to each other for longer than I've known the woman I am now married to! Is it possible to make memories in cyberspace? Sadly, the inter-cyborg-ational-ish relationship I have had with people, GIF images, and other binary code on this blog has no grounding in reality but only in the reality defined by my mind, created through spending countless hours peering into the glare of a computer monitor. What if one day Blogger were no longer free? Would I, enraged, swallow the password to my log-in page so that I never blogged again? And if I never blogged again, what would become of all the fond memories of logging in to view the familiar black background and freaky yet ocean's eleven-ish green, blue and red circles dotting the background of the sum total of my spacious thoughts over the last 4 years?

No one cares. But for the moment, no such crisis must be averted, for none exists.

A Degree Cooler

That's about all I felt upon graduating, and that's about all I wanted the weather to be when I graduated with a bachelor of scientology in accountablility this May 2008.

Well, backing up, I pulled an "A" in my individual income tax course, a stunner of a miracle, my final exam breaking the curve in my section and pulling my grade up to a 90.1-ish%. It seemed a poetic justice that I end up working a part-time job auditing tax returns for the Louisiana Department of Revenue this summer, until I start law school this August. I graduated sumo cum laude with College Horrors and was privileged to wear several honorary academic cord-on bleu sandwiches around my neck(tie). Should I say that the tax work this summer is a poetic justice, or a contrapasso? Ssshhhiver. No worries, it's only purgatorio, I'm passing through-o this place-o. That's why I called it a summer job, oh? If you don't know of what I speak, have a chat with Dante Aligheri, and no that's not a famous pizzeria entrepreneur, either.

Excuse my mannerisms, I'm sure you'll understand that I thoroughly enjoyed my graduation and [sincerity] praise God that I enjoyed the fruits of my labour after four years of [/sincerity] hard [sincerity] work [/sincerity]. The point being, my good fellows, that the bestowal of honors by other mere mortals does little to excite my soul. The reward for a job well done comes long before recognition by another being of a fallen race. It comes in the moment of completion of a task, a contented smile and crossed arms while in solitude, and a bowed head before one's God for the strength to have experienced a temporary joy.

Amanda's graudation with a B.A. in Broadcast Production (Communications) from Loyola University in New Orleans makes me a proud hubbie, indeed. She faced a rigorous curriculum and was very active in her community and in the school's activities and sports while a student. Her graduation ceremony was beautiful. Mine was fairly boring, but regardless, getting 2 meals, one at Copeland's and one at Olive Garden, with family dining with us, more than compensated for any suffering/happiness enjoyed/experienced during our commencement exercises.

I suppose the question is, "How does it feel to be a graduate?" Well, maybe this is a bit unfair, but I don't think it nearly matched the question, "How does it feel to be married?" from roughly a year ago. So now any other experience in life, including commencement, is subject to taking the backseat to the thrill of new matrimony. I am grateful for the education I received. I also am confused that my sister-in-law still in college is making more than I am this summer. But I do not fret; for law school orientation I shall soon beget. As in, I shall bring it forth into my life, not so much beget as in "newly formed organism tumbling out of my bowels."

Serious

From henceforth, I shall be considerably more serious in my blogging.

Graduation Part # Try Again

I think what was most emotional about graduation was the people. Thinking of the close friendships forged by conversations, intense experiences, living and learning with many wonderful people while studying at university. There was never any doubt in my mind I would graduate, so graduation wasn't honestly a huge deal to me. High school graduation was much more enjoyable, for me. I enjoyed Amanda's graduation more than mine because I enjoy rooting for loved ones, of which she is chief (after my Jesus, of course). Amanda's parents drove in from Houston two weekends in a row to see their daughter and then son-in-law graduate. They are such giving people. I love them.

Bienville Towers

It could be a superhero's lair, but it's actually the name of the new apartment complex Amanda and I live at. We LOVE it. It's so nice to have a place with central air conditioning, carpet, a garbage disposal and dishwasher, and even a balcony. Yes, a balcony. Which means we live on the 2nd floor, which is fine now, but wasn't as rock 'n' roll when my dad-in-law and I were squeezing our gluteals as we panted for breath carrying huge pieces of a room-sized sectional couch up stairs so narrow that even Gumby would have to diet to squeeze through.

Our place is all decorated nice and it's so...nice. It just makes me feel like saying, "niiiiiiice." Isn't that nice?

The Man

Actually, okay, so here's the skinny on Mandy and I's summer employment. She's working for the man, and I'm working for the woman. Literally.

Actually she's working for the man, but he's making her work for the woman, being herself, meaning she technically is paid as an independent contractor. She's working as a production manager person at Green Screen TV, a local production company, and she's really getting to put to use the filming, editing, and other skills she learned while in college. This is full-time employment. My baby's in the real world.

I work for the Louisiana Department of Revenue. It's...swell. There are so many interesting returns to audit. And renegade lizards, lunchtime mouth-stuffing cracker competitions, hot-mess humorous statements, and other things, ask me about it sometime.

Two words: Supporting documentation.

Cave Party

The Cave hath risen again! Me, Cody, Zeke, Amanda, Recka, M.Coates,Christina went to visit Tollie in Panama City Beach, Florida, where he's workin' full time. Lots of beach, beer (aka Pepsi), Risk, Perfect Dark, Monty Python's Holy Grailz, cajun cooking, and other Cave favorites. It was quite a reunion. Pictures below.

#80F Other Refundable

My friend Jacob married Ali! It was the first wedding I was in! Aside from my own, of course. Me and Kenji bonded a lot. We shared a bed and fought over the covers more than Amanda and I ever could. I spent a good minute wrestling with the hotel customer service trying to get a new TV so we could play vid. games at Jake's bachelor party, but nothing could be done, though Marriott even sent the "engineering department"to our room at midnight.
I went with my family to a revival in Florida, and God really encouraged us through it. What's a revival? Hands up, and I'll tell you! It's a state of being revived. It's when God breathes his freshness into the souls of His people and miracles happen. Hearts are changed and people hunger for holiness.
I'm reading Clear and Present Danger, Tom Clancy's political/technological thriller about America's war on drugs. It's so long. It's so good. I'm so only halfway done with it.
Wall-E and The Dark Knight are must see movies. Warning: though I mentioned both movies in the same sentence, both are known to have vastly different sets of emotions associated with each. Wall-E is the cutest robot ever. The Joker is the most genuinely horrifying and fascinating villain ever.
I've been playing frolf, or frisbee golf a lot this summer. I like it a lot, I just get tired of losing frisbees to the tree boughs overhead.
More other refundable credits later.

I think this is enough text to resuscitate the blog.

Agreed?

A Few Photos

My sister, Hannah, came over and had some bonding time with Amanda and I one weekend. Among other things, we went to Blue Bayou waterpark, ate Coldstone ice cream, played Donkey Kong 2 and acted crazy.

Amanda and I went to the Art Melt, an artsy-fartsy event in downtown Baton Rouge. We saw tap-dancing, music, fine art displays, and alchies (only in Louisiana is there free-flowing booze next to fine art displays). Here was my favorite piece out of all of them.
Cave Party @ Panama City Beach, baby! Shenanigans. Catiwhompis. Discombobulated. (That's for you, Kenji.) From left to right, Recka, Matt Coates, Bean, Limebeast, Zeeb, and gloating cave master, Therefore.

This really happened. A kung-fu showdown happened.

Zeke shows us both a good time and his mouth innards in one singular gesture of truly great stature.

Left: Jacob and Ali do that married life thing.
Below: My sister Jessica and I bond. Amanda and I had her over and we had blast.

Married life. By that I mean, I just came from the water closet, and, feeling relieved, if yanowha'im'shayin, and my lovely bride decides to capture this feeling of relief on candid camera. I have decided, in turn, to share this profound emotional experience with you, cyberland.
After my graduation, my loving family acts loving and congratulatory and nice and familial and nice.

Just to prove to everyone that in married life, you can continue to eat great, here is proof that we always make sure to have nice hot rolls as a dinner side at our evening meals.

Old State Capitol. I got interviewed by the news people there. My wife volunteered me.
You know you dig it.

Amanda's family at graduation. Aren't they cuuuute?

So at the Shaw Center downtown, they have these fountains that periodically erupt out of the ground like Old Faithful, and my sister wanted to put on her bathing suit and, well, bathe.

My brother Matt graduated high school, too. Now he looks forward to college. And studying, even.

Not Copping Out

2008-04-22T17:23:00.003-05:00

Since my last "Recent in Review," I have filled out federal, Louisiana State, New York State and New York City tax returns to claim a sizable amount of refunds; completed, defended and given a talk on a 50-page thesis entitled "The Creation of Wealth for Company Stakeholders through Managerial Behavior in Leveraged Buyouts"; accepted enrollment at and sat in on classes at Paul M. Hebert Law Center, LSU (commencing classes in August); enjoyed writing fairly engaging papers (20 pages worth) about the Roman Republic; staffed a pro-life conference for Louisiana high school students (entitled Louisiana Camp Joshua...!); went to Mulate's for Amanda's birthday and went cajun dancing; rocked out at my third-ever Switchfoot concert at House of Blues New Orleans; beheld bucking broncos at Rodeo Houston in Texas; located a new apartment at Bienville Towers for Amanda and I; had little success finding a employer in my major willing to hire me since I cannot work past August due to law school; played Super Smash Bros. Brawl for Nintendo Wii for the first time at Cody's birthday party; played a season of intramural soccer on the Roflcopters soccer team; visited my parents and parents-in-law whenver possible; and watched the faithful hand of God provide for my wife and I time and time again.

The Doctor Said...

2008-04-22T08:42:00.003-05:00

...we need some staples for his head! Name that song. An old Relient K one. The answer is more obvious than you might think.

Incidentally, that has absoutely nothing to do with anything, much less this blog.

Yes this blog still exists. And so do I.

There are several possible explanations for why I have blogged less and less as time goes on and on:

Monotonous lifestyle with nothing to write about
Analysis: Not so credible. Life as a freshman was less monotonous than now? When I was a goofball barely studying yet still making a 4.0, life was more complex? Not so much.
Too busy
Analysis: Pfft. Yeah, I may be studying harder and more involved with other activities than when I started this weblog. But we make time for the things we want to do.
Married
Analysis: I plead the fifth. Wait...yes, of course I am too busy spending quality time with my wife to blog! Amanda, do you still read this thing any more?
Having lost the tendency to think deeply
Analysis: Huh? Quit playing.
Having lost the desire to communicate deep thinkings (...thoughts?)
Analysis: Oh, a grave and injurious assumption, this! Ho, to arms brethren, defend the cause! Hoist the standards! The time for magnanimity doth not rear its head! Whoever hath thus spoken shall be requited! With such hasty answer as hath been given, such hasty rebuke shall be issued!

Okay, okay. So I haven't been blogging because I've been too busy spinning webs around Baton Rouge and bouting with Doc Oc.

Recent in Review

2008-02-20T08:25:00.043-06:00

Well, it's been a while, so here's a post for the month of February, with pictures, which are pretty, which increases readership, to be sure:

Class. That's pretty much what I've been up to. This past month has been the most consistent studying I've done while in college. I attribute it to being married and wanting to work harder but also wanting to no go out of my final semester with a whimper. So this is mainly what I've been doing. Nothing rock n' roll.
Income Tax Accounting: detailed, interesting. I love the fact that the IRS has to specifically exclude de minimis fringe benefits from gross income. I don't have to pay income tax on the "economic benefit" of toilet paper I use to wipe my bum at work, but only because Congress wishes it to be so.

Strategic Management: business babble. we get the idea...if you haven't bought yourself one of those cool "value chains," you're so old school sole proprietorship. Grow up and be an LLP. I do have to say the BBC documentary of "Morgan Car Company," is interesting and worth a bloody laugh, if you can blooming well understand the chaps waffling on the programme.

Auditing: I like the concept of serving the public interest, but I'll let someone else in society do this. Pass. "How many invoices have you looked at, eh? Not as many as I have, I'll wager!" "I'm assuring the financial statements are free of material misstatement in other ways, George. You know, complying with SAS 99, understanding how the client's internal controls are functioning, revising the materiality level for that loan valuation account! Wait 'til I tell the ladies about this stuff after work, it'll knock them off their feet!"

Roman Republic: Loads of work, but it's worth it. Probably my favorite class. I can't even think of much material here lending iteslf to mockery. I did think that Claudius' Battle of Drepana and the Sacred Chickens from the First Punic War makes a good bedtime story. You know the old saying, "When in Rome...kill!" I added the fourth word in that phrase after typing a paper on the believablility of outcomes in Livy's work on Rome's ancient history.

I'm up to 18 pages on my thesis. Writing, refining the outlining, researching as much as I can. I'm hoping/thinking the final draft will be somewhere between 30 and 40 pages. This is definitely a "get it done" assignment. I wouldn't wish anyone to have to read it, except the defense committee. It'll be technically accurate, but it's not the sort of thing you'd proudly display at Starbucks as your latest reading material. Ah, the effects of leveraged buyouts upon managerial behavior. Invigorating, isn't it?

In other news: Thank you God and thank you admissions committees at the following law schools! Denver University Sturm College of Law, Paul M. Hebert LSU Law Center, Loyola University New Orleans College of Law.

Amanda and I went to Washington, D.C. for the March for Life in late January. We slept in a high school gym with the other Loyola University New Orleans students accompanying us. I enjoyed the "Met" subway system. It's very clean and efficient. The weather was FRIGID. We went to a couple awesome museums: the Holocaust Museum and the Air and Space Museum. The former was life-changing. We also went to the Students for Life of America conference at Catholic University. When in D.C., eat at Union Station at Uno's...it's great.

On Mardi Gras break, we hung out with a guy who built a tree house with air conditioning, electricity, and plumbing...and it sleeps five comfortably. Stuart McClendon also is a lawyer, operates his own furniture production factory...and it's all in the "country".

Went to a pretty cool Chi Alpha bonfire at the Bullers' house...

On Valentine's Day, I took Amanda out to Bistro Byronz for dinner. There was a jazz band, and I brought her flowers. We watched Kate and Leopold and gave each other gifts. If Valentine's Day is sweet when dating someone, it's that much better when married, trust me.

Went to the Green Bean coffeehouse to hear my good friends Zechariah Brewer and Christine Thrower play music...

Jacob Benda shaved my head for me recently...

Just kidding. Well, just kidding, that was Ms. Spears, this is me:

Amanda and I have been watching through the Band of Brothers series. It's quite powerful. The series traces "E" Company of an airborne division from their training in America to the Normandy invasion to Operation Market Garden to the Battle of the Bulge to Hitler's Nest in Austria. The most fascinating part of the series is the character details of the leadership, especially Dick Winters. From what I recall, the book of the same name by the late Steven E. Ambrose is pretty close to the series, and vice-versa. Great book and great TV series.

I've watched 3 movies recenlty: Juno, Cloverfield, and Rambo. (All one-word titles. How'd I manage that?)

Juno: Amanda and I saw it together. About a girl who gets pregnant in high school and decides to carry her baby to term and give the child up for adoption. But don't expect a reverential, serious treatment of the subject matter. As a bit of a caveat to viewers, I don't recommend it to everyone because it has quite a bit of sex-related dialogue, as can be expected with such subject matter. Interestingly, though, the girl considers abortion but winds up finding herself pro-life. The movie, while using comedy as way to draw the crowd in, winds up being suprisingly and believably more heartfelt than expected at the film's end. The main character, thankfully, is not an overly sexualized glamour model who looks 25. She looks like she's a petite little high school student who made a bad choice. And she learns the consequences. All-in-all, I really enjoyed this.

Cloverfield: Yes, yes, yes! This is the film I've been waiting for. I haven't seen The Blair Witch Project, but apparently the filming style is similar. Except Cloverfield kicks it up a notch. A giant monster apparently attacks New York City and some partying twenty-something-year-olds run around the city for dear life, with the camera being passed to those who survive, to document the event. The sounds and the sights are spectacular; see this one on a digital picture screen. What makes the film excellent is that it is a "you are there" feeling. The film is shot from the perspective of someone documenting an event. What makes it great also makes it bad. Amanda, along with many other Americans who have seen the film, got motion sickness from the constantly wavering camera through the length of the film. Don't make this one a date movie, but save the date to see it before it's out of theaters...don't wait for the DVD.

Rambo: My friend Jacob and I saw this...and I later apologized to him for making him go with me. It was terrible! The only thing worth seeing is Rambo cut people in half with a .50-caliber machine gun and laugh at his little guttural phrases like, "Either die for nothing or live for something!" All I remember from the movie is jungle, horrified missionaries, exploding bodies, and John Rambo's heavy breathing. The first 3 Rambos were just fine in their cheezy way, but this latest one adds cheeze with extreme gore...I'm not sure whether to laugh or puke, but I decided to only do the former but wanted to do the latter.

I've been listening to a lot of Delirious? music recently, and it's blessed me to once again fall in love with what has always been my favorite band.

The album Glo begins with a steady drum beat, loud but clean guitars and...chanting monks to a Psalm 63 declration of "God you are my God and I will seek you." The song is eventually joined by a high-pitched violin and choir virtually shouting "We're going to the house of God. Are you coming?" Then, the song "God's Romance" is announced by thrashing guitars and a BPM overload that threatens to explode. As the space rock progresses we are reminded that there are "people are across the world with a heartbeat for holiness...feel His pleasure, we are God's romance." The quieter and brooding "Investigate" opens with a Dobro guitar and moodily reminds the listener of God's comprehensive knowledge of human beings, a la Psalm 139. The album then takes an acoustic break in "What Would I Have Done?" ["if it wasn't for Jesus?"] and then contains the modern worship classic (that Delirious? penned), "My Glorious." And that's only half the album.

How could I fail to mention Mezzamorphis, the album released before Glo? Though the band consistenly sings about getting to heaven and contains phrases that recognizable as scripturally-based, the band only mentions "God" once and was accused of "selling out" at the time.

I've walked down a road where the devil's been / Where the kids are seeing things they should have never seen / And the ancient stone knows the deeper tale / About a bloody game they call the holy war // Heaven is my home / And there'll be no shame to bear // I've walked down a road where the angels' been / Where the kids are seeing things that we have never seen / And the ancient stone knows the deeper tale / About a bloody king who won the holy war // Heaven is my home / And there'll be no shame to bear / Heaven is my home / And there'll be no refugees

-lyrics from "Heaven"

Another song from their latest album The Mission Bell sings about the injustice of abortion, questions the violation of Psalm 139 through plastic surgery, declares there is only one true God, asks forgiveness, and continually returns to the chorus "Our God Reigns," which is also the title of the song.

I will close this lengthy post with a thought from William Jay's devotional. When the New Testament says that the blood of Christ speaks better things than those of Abel, it is saying that while the blood of Abel cried out to be avenged, the blood of Christ cried out for our pardon. What a dramatic reversal.

That's all for now, folks. Until next time, remember to get your Adobe Acrobat Reader updates regularly and update your Facebook status at least once per week.

My Final Undergraduate Semester

2008-01-17T08:16:00.000-06:00

First impressions:

In the first week, I have been more motivated than in any other collegiate semester. I have become addicted to homework. Funny, that. They usually say "senioritis" kicks in by now and there is a tendency to want to slack off. Perhaps, it's because I know I need to achieve better study habits in preparation for law school. Personally, I attribute this to being married. The fact that Amanda is commuting to two days per week to Loyola puts enormous time constraints on her, and derivatively, me. Therefore, though this may be a surprising confession to some, being married while in school is not only do-able, but also efficient, if both people are likeminded.
The prior statement should be viewed in light of the fact that it is only the first week of class. Ah yes, I thought my contact lenses were especially rose-tinted this morning.
Income Tax Accounting: I thought I would hate it. No, I thought I would loathe it. Once I started reading the book, my dismay was gone. It's great stuff. To clarify: so far, there has been an emphasis on the tax law: its sources (judicial, executory, legislative), its development, its rationale, etc. We're about to start memorizing forms and the fact that Line 37 is always adjusted gross income, and such. That might not be so pleasant. But learning about the logic for deductions, exemptions, etc., is definitely not a bad thing.
Auditing: Just your ole' fashioned external financial statement audits for public corporations. Did I mention I'm enjoying the readings more than the classes? The book is pretty down-to-earth on what is honestly black-and-white anyway it's colored. Oh well, it can't be much worse than Internal Audit. And then...
Strategic Management: What? Some class that everyone graduating from the business college has to take the semester prior to graduation. And no one seems to know what it really is, yet. Something about long-range planning. Competitive advantage, business landscape, Jimi Hendrix, stuff like that.
The Roman Republic: History minor's in the bag!...after this course. Rome's pretty off-the-heezy-fo'-sheezy-ma-neezy, but it's hard to judge if there will be a correlation between this neezy-ness and the class. There is an average of about 100 pages per week, in reading. So far it's rather boring reading. But at least it's not accounting. (Did I mention I'm an accounting major?) (P.S.S.S. I never researched the shizzle-dizzle language used earlier. If anyone comes up with something definitively denotative, please have a dialogue with me.)
ISDS, yeah. I love working here. Yeah. That's all. ........Yeeeeeah.
What??!
William Jay's Evening Exercises. Not calisthenics. It's a devotional Amanda and I received as a wedding present. I had ignored it till now. Picking it up, I have to honestly say, I have been blessed beyond measure. Reverend Jay knows how to take one verse and milk it for all it's worth. There are several trials that God has allowed Amanda and I to experience together recently, but we know that, as Jay mentions, God makes us fruitful in the land of our suffering. Anyway, Jay is a contemporary of Spurgeon, and from the tenacity of his writing, I have to conclude this man walked in the shadow of the Almighty.
The 459 Commons is the new dining hall. I like it. The lighting, the carpet, booth seating, the pleasant cooks, etc. It's just very high-trafficked.
My hands like the way they smell: Irish Spring soap.
Oh yeeees. My honors thesis on How Leveraged Buyouts Affect Managerial Behavior. Do you beg my pardon? You have it. As John Barreca says, "I KNOW it's gonna be God" [that enables the completion of the thesis]. (He's writing one, two. That is to say, he's writing one, too.)

Cheers.

Welcome 2008

2008-01-03T14:03:00.000-06:00

I just realized I haven't posted since last November, which gives the false impression of giving up blogging. NEVER! They can have my blog when they pry it from my...er, someone buys out Blogger or something like that.

Last semester wrapped up nicely. Amanda and I went all the way to the final game with the Cherry Pickers LSU intramural soccer team. We had a "War Night" at our apartment, including 15 people eating MRE's, watching Black Hawk Down, playing Call of Duty 4, and playing the board game Risk. One of my favorite moments at LSU this year came with the annual Christmas tree lighting ceremony, which included vocal and band performances, scenes from The Nutcracker, free food and CC's coffee, and a candlelit caroling portion.

Finals week I pushed and prayed, and the result is straight A's. God came through once again, I know, especially with Louisiana History. The prof must have curved my grade. After an early Christmas with my family, Amanda, David, Valerie and I drove to Houston to join with Amanda's parents for Christmas. From there we made a 20-hours straight drive to Arvada, Colorado to visit with the other Mautz relations. We had a white Christmas! Lots of sledding ensued.

Other than that, the Chi Alpha Christmas Snow Ball was great. Amanda and I swing-danced together better than I thought we were capable of. I Am Legend is a great movie. I LOVE the electric razor my mother- and father-in-law got me and the Swiss Army pocket knife Amanda got me. I already applied to LSU and Loyola New Orleans Law and am working on finishing the applications for Quinnipiac in Hamden, CT, Denver University and University of Houston.

Cheers.

More than a cute little girl with majestic polar bears.

2007-11-27T16:42:00.001-06:00

I urge you to NOT support The Golden Compass this hol(i)day season.

Holiday is a combination of the words "holy day." The Golden Compass proves unholy indeed. The movie is based on the first of 3 books in a trilogy called "His Darker Materials," by Philip Pullman, a vocal atheist. The ultimate triumph in the third book is the murder of a character named "God."

Anyone ever read the Narnia books by Christian author C.S. Lewis? The author of The Golden Compass detests them. He wrote "His Darker Materials" in response to the Christian ideals of The Chronicles of Narnia.

"I loathe the 'Narnia' books," Pullman has said in previous press interviews. "I hate them with a deep and bitter passion, with their view of childhood as a golden age from which sexuality and adulthood are a falling away." He has called the series "one of the most ugly and poisonous things" he's ever read.

--Fox News Article - Read the rest.

Newlyweds Just Wanna Have Fun

2007-11-05T11:52:00.000-06:00

Thursday, Amanda and I were on the radio. It was the "Ignite the Fight: Students for Life on Air" program again. I hosted it. The first half-hour I talked to the leaders of pro-life clubs, Kim Montelone of LSU and Matt McCann of Loyola University New Orleans. The second half Amanda and I talked about the annual conference.

Friday. A good day. I had a good conversation with an amiable pro-choice girl at the LSU Students for Life contact table. While in the Dept. of ISDS later, I created a Facebook event.

You see, newlyweds want to have fun, too. Sometimes people think that newly married couples want to hog each other all the time.

And this is true. We are still honeymooning.

And yet, we crave time with our friends. So to demonstrate this, I created an event on Facebook entitled "Batty Berzerk Bonkers Bizzare Blowing-Yo'-Mind [Zombie] Pwnage". I called it a "game night." The result was Amanda and I plus seven other people doing a mixture of Guitar Hero III, the board game Monopoly, and Halo 3, plus chips/salsa and chocolate chip cookies. If you missed out this time, look for another pwnage event in the near future.

Earlier in the evening, though, I went to the Shipps' house for Zack Mitchell's "Honey Do" party. We had some barbecue and reminisced about old times and how now that he's gettin' married in two weeks, he'll have lots of projects to do that begin with Kristin saying "Honey, do this!" or "Honey, do that!" We also had a special "man" run through the fields...

Saturday, Patrick and Mica showed us the wonders of Tunica Falls, in Mississippi. We hiked several miles through some beautiful forests with ravines and creek beds that dumped over cliffs, creating small waterfalls. If you live in Louisiana, it's not that far away and definitely worth a day trip.

Sunday Amanda and I had a nice, long picnic by the LSU lakes, played soccer, and watched half of a bloody war movie (Black Hawk Down) before going to bed, in the process of which I banged my head on an open closet door and made her think I had a concussion until a medical website assuaged this fallacious fear and we fell asleep to the sound of an air conditioner unit as noisy as the unit in The Brave Little Toaster.

Mad, Mad World

2007-11-02T08:38:00.000-05:00

As I sat in the dining hall glancing at the television, an advert came on: "Tonight's Survivor: China is sponsored by Aussie shampoo."

So the Australians are in league with the Chinese?

Louisiana Students for Life 3rd Annual Pro-Life Conference at Louisiana State University, October 27th-28th

2007-10-31T13:04:00.000-05:00

Saturday morning in Howe-Russell hall never felt so good. Ancient archaeological finds and artsy dinosaur bones faded into the background as the lobby was transformed into a multi-table exhibit for the pro-life movement. Students munched on hot, fresh Mary Lee donuts and sipped orange juice and CC's Coffee as they waited for my wife to kick off the conference.

Everyone was ushered into the auditorium. After a warm welcome from Amanda, the first speaker was up. Dr. Michael New of the University of Alabama talked about pro-life legislation (i.e., informed consent, parental consent, waiting period laws) and its statistical effects on the abortion rate and ratio. Next was Dr. John Baker of the LSU Law School to speak on the legal history of abortion. I missed part of his talk to go outside and welcome Cynthia Collins, my long-time friend and spiritual mentor. I introduced her and she seized the day speaking of her own and other women's personal experiences with abortion and the road to recovery. Father Joseph Cazanavette spoke next on the dignity of human life, which I went to pick up a speaker from his hotel.

This speaker was none other than Mr. Steve Wagner of Stand to Reason in Los Angeles, California. I was able to spend a lot of time driving this gentleman around Baton Rouge over a couple days. What an inspirational man and apologeticist for bio-ethics! He spoke after Father Joseph on changing hearts and minds on abortion. After an organization called Crossroads presented, the students attended workshops: Ben Clapper on running an effective pro-life club contact table on campus and his fiancee, Kristen Clark, on effective sidewalk counseling at abortion clinics. Steve Wagner spoke a second time, this time on stem cell research. Of note is the point that there are 1.1 million infertile parents who want to adopt and there are 400,000 "children" (embryos) in frozen storage. Ben Wetmore of Students for Life of America ended the night with talk on how to fundraise for a club.

The next morning was special. Louisiana State Representative Gary Beard and former candidate for Lt. Governor (also, Louisiana Family Forum "Outstanding Family Advocate") gave a talk on leadership in the pro-life movement. With great sobriety, he alluded to Gideon's 300 men and the need for great numbers but individuals dedicated to Truth. Ben Wetmore wrapped up his talk from the previous night and I concluded with a talk on effective campus outreach.

LSU students, there will be a meeting this Thursday, 8 pm in the Caddo Room, 3rd Floor, LSU Student Union. As I told the group this weekend, if you are pro-life, you are not part of a movement. You're not an activist, this is who you are. Be there this Thursday and take a stand; get educated.

Ruth+Relient K+Switchfoot Concert

2007-10-31T09:31:00.000-05:00

10.29.07

As I Amanda and I sauntered into the pulsing arena in the Baton Rouge River Center to our third-row seats, we were already greeted by the sounds of the band Ruth. A long-haired thin guy in a red flannel shirt picked up one foot, then the other as he swayed gently with his acoustic guitar. The rest of the band provided a bass drum-heavy and alternative-rock guitar sound reminiscent of The Benjy Davis Project.

After a brief break, the crackling speakers played a mixture of sounds and songs with the “Appetite for Construction” tour theme, as a bouncy Relient K took stage to an unfurling banner behind them. They launched directly into “I So Hate Consequences.” Keeping with the up-tempo heavy rock, Relient K followed with “Devastation and Reform,” from their latest album Five Score and Seven Years Ago. After “The Best Thing” and “Be My Escape,” Matt Thiessen started singing a Tears for Fears song, which led into the fan-favorite “In Love with the 80s.” The tone turned serious with the brooding “Which to Bury, us or the Hatchet?”, which saw some tasteful but somber ukulele action. It was back to the upbeat with the crooned “Must Have Done Something Right” and the piano-led “Forgiven.” Relient K then announced something special from their new Christmas album Let it Snow, Baby…Let it Reindeer: “Sleigh Ride,” complete with falling “snow” at the front of the arena. (I was right on the edge of it.) The sincere and longing “Give Until There’s Nothing Left” was followed by the hate-it-or-love-it “Sadie Hawkins Dance,” during which the band invited a crowd member to come play guitar during one round of the chorus. A bit of a surprise next, with the band asking if the crowd watched the TV show “The Office.” After a little cheering, the band played a made-up song about the show, eventually going into the piano notes that open the theme song. “I Need You” and “High of 75” were followed by the closer, “Who I Am Hates Who I’ve Been.”

A bit of a break, and a large shooting star appeared as the backdrop to a new band to take stage. As the star began to light up in different colors, Switchfoot took the stage to a quirky version of the opening chords of “Meant to Live,” after which Jon Foreman said, “Thank you and good evening Baton Rouge…but it’s not quite time for that song yet.” They launched straight into the wild title track off the latest album Oh! Gravity. There was scarcely breathing room for the next big hit “Stars” with its minute-long intro. Electronic noises filled the air as “This is Your Life” took the stage. This song has really taken me by surprise. It was always a stepchild of Switchfoot songs in my eyes, but they have really done something with it in a live setting. Jon Foreman bent low to sing and yell into his guitar pickups. Next, the band played bits of pop songs that led into the slow-burning “Gone”. An extra-long introduction for the rocker “American Dream” came next, with the band pulling something I’ve never seen before. Right before the last chorus of the song, everyone in the band froze in mid-air. Instruments and limbs were held in frozen awkward positions for nearly 2 minutes until suddenly the band was unfrozen into a frenzied conclusion to the song. The band continued playing some unfamiliar music as Jon Foreman grabbed the high-hat cymbal and started banging on it, swinging it around and strobe flights flashed as the stage threatened to explode. After the chaos settled down, Jon appeared again with an acoustic guitar for the opening of the Western-ish “Dirty Second Hands.” “This next song is about Unity and the fight to achieve it” were the words that ushered “We Are One Tonight” onstage, which led into a remixed and beat-heavy “The Shadow Proves the Sunshine”. Quiet took the stage as Jon Foreman grabbed a new microphone with a cord lit up by Christmas lights and walked out into the crowd crooning the lyrics to the piano-driven “On Fire.” As the song ended, Jon, still out in the crowd, asked the crowd to sing the opening vocals to the imagery-laden “Awakening.” After this crowd favorite, Switchfoot announced a new song, “Rebuild,” which included all the members from Ruth and Relient K on stage to help play and sing. The set closed with the inevitable “Meant to Live” and an encore of “Dare You to Move.”

Summary:
(1) Ruth is a band to look forward to
(2) Relient K is musically very technically sound but better suited to smaller crowds
(3) Switchfoot is the king of arena concerts, with enough bells & whistles but also passionate and genuine moments to make a concert-goer want to listen to their songs for days at a time afterward

Do Not Move

2007-10-22T21:22:00.000-05:00

The last post I typed earlier in the day was one born of frustration.

I did not realize how bad my attitude was until I realized how little I was worshiping God.

I even got to the point in the day that verbal expressions of praise from others agitated me. In the weight room today, Patrick analogized this to an eight-year-old who despises the kiss of a married man and woman. I found my attitude had blinded me to the beauty of intimacy of worship.

And there's nothing like a good dose of conviction to cleanse the soul.

Tonight it came in the form of the Book of Jeremiah.

Jeremiah 2:11, Hath a nation changed their gods, which are yet no gods? but my people have changed their glory for that which doth not profit. The ungodly are dogmatic and unyielding in their servitude to lust, pride, obscenity, materialism, and the gods of this world. And yet we, who hold the Truth, have turned our backs away from God and apologize for our stance. I believe God would say to us, "DO NOT MOVE!" The world will not move from guarding and defending refuse, so why should we move from defending the Truth?

12:32 Can a maid forget her ornaments, or a bride her attire? yet my people have forgotten me days without number. Would Amanda have forgotten to wear her wedding dress on our wedding day? Would I have forgotten my tuxedo? How could I go days upon end without even venturing into my Savior's presence?

Selah.

We Spend Our Years as a Tale that is Told

2007-10-22T09:18:00.000-05:00

Last week I took a mid-term exam upon which I wrote nine pages. Sadly, many of the generalizations I made about Louisiana history between 1717 and 1763 (and which I worked hard to learn from class and the professor's textbook) on the exam will be accepted as proof I have learned a lot about Louisiana history. I miss junior high Louisiana history. I may not have learned high-level statements about demographic growth of the time, but I did learn a narrative full of character stories, battles and glories.

Amanda and I went with Zeke and Cody to Hammond Friday night to have coffees at the Green Bean. This gave me a fellowship fix and reminded me of how carefree, loved and loving I felt when I had long hair, a scruffy and scary beard and wore hopelessly mismatched thrift store articles of clothing with worn out red Chuck Taylor tennis shoes. Afterward we went to the Wesleyan foundation at SLU for one of the most awkward concerts ever. There were a handful of people in a room standing around chatting while a full-throttle guitar act provided a cacophonous background noise. No matter, I glanced at my friends and saw their smiles and was reminded of why I love them so much. As A Soup Named Stew took stage, I couldn't help but giggle and cheer as the likes of "Robot Dentist" and "She Broke Up With Me" reminded me of all those times at Cafe Chi Alpha.

That evening Amanda and I would spend curled up next to each other in a twin-sized bed at my parents' house, sleeping in until 10:30 a.m. to be greeted by my Hero, my dad, who would lead us to the polls to vote for the victorious Bobby Jindal. After a family brunch at the International House of Pancakes, my Sunshine, Jessica Frances, cried into her pillow until I asked her what was wrong. Her big brother was leaving to go to college again, just like 3 years ago when I had done that to her the first time.

Back in Baton Rouge Saturday night, Patrick Holly, the kindred spirit and friend who always has something glorious to say, gladly accompanied me to the drunken idiosy known as the student section of Tiger Stadium. We watched some jerk spit ice at his girlfriend, along with the best band of any college in the nation and a struggling football team that pulled back into the lead with one second left in the game. Thirty-two ounce cups of soda pop flew effortlessly across the stadium as the fans threatened to produce a nuclear fusion of celebration. Either the fact that it had been a whole year since I had been in Tiger Stadium or the intensity of the moment prompted me to declare it my best ever moment in Death Valley. As my friend and I sat in his car deadlocked in post-gameday traffic, we talked about things in life that matter, wary of our Arch nemesis, Smalltalk.

But what happened to the Saturdays of meeting up with all my friends who live on campus and tailgating / going to the game together?

At least some things never change, and constancy is realized. As in all past athletic endeavors, I struggled to be non-awkward at my second intramural soccer game last night.

At least, I'm good at speling. One day I'm going to make that an undergraduate degree. Spelling. It would be more useful that most majors out there.

Business Management?

How could I have ever wanted to major in that? How can that be a major? Theorists even debate whether or not management can be taught scientifically. I guess you're not a trait theorist if you choose that major; or you're too apathetic to care what your major is.

<>Wait...no, that would be Accounting. < /self-loathing >

"Ignite the Fight: Students for Life on Air"

2007-10-05T09:11:00.000-05:00

Last night's radio show was a grand success! From 7:30-8:30 p.m., Kacie Hampton and I (as well as Jim Fontaine for the first 15 minutes) were on the air with Radio Maria, a Catholic station broadcasting in Louisiana and throughout the world via Internet. Because Ben Clapper was out of town, he had us take over the show for him. We were more than a bit nervous! But everything went smoothly, and we had a great time promoting the LSL conference and encouraging listeners with success stories of how the pro-life movement is gaining momentum on college campuses across Louisiana.

Once again, I would like to remind everyone to go to the Louisiana Students for Life website and register - only $15 - immediately! The conference schedule is posted, and I am very passionate as I know personally and have spoken with several of the groups sending speakers! It an SEC off-weekend, so no football excuses! Be there October 27th and 28th at LSU's campus to stand for our generation, to raise a voice for a group of people that cannot speak up for themselves: The Unborn.

If you need help getting to the conference or if I can in any way assist you, e-mail me at (jclayt4@lsu.edu).

Radio Show: I Need YOUR Help

2007-10-03T22:51:00.001-05:00

Friends,

Through my work with Louisiana Students for Life, a last-minute opportunity has come up for a couple of my fellow students and I to be guests on a pro-life radio program tomorrow, Thursday evening, October 4th from 7:30-8:30 p.m.

I will be calling in at 7:30 p.m. via phone. However, I am looking for a land line, as opposed to a cell phone, to ensure a good connection. I would be much-obliged if I could use your phone for that hour. I would also need a quiet room. If you would like to help, email me at (jclayt4@lsu.edu), Facebook me, or respond to this blog post under "Comments" (depending on whether you're reading the weblog or Facebook note version of this).

Thanks!
Bean

Lsatious

2007-10-01T09:03:00.000-05:00

The past couple weeks feel like they've been busy, but in a good way. Louisiana Students for Life work constantly beckons: loads of phone calls, lots of officer meetings at the "Hampton inn", and Amanda and I even taking a mid-week trip to Louisiana Tech in Ruston to talk to the pro-life club there (8 hours of driving that day!). I've had several tests recently, as can be expected (you know, the whole college thing). I'm finally back into a meager workout routine of weightlifting twice per week with "the boys", playing racquetball once or twice per week with Amanda and playing soccer on Fridays (and apparently I'm signed up to an intramural team now, as well). We went to Mississippi to visit with my grandparents and to New Orleans to visit Amanda's friends recently. The thing that occupied my mind and energy the most for the last two weeks was the LSAT (Law School Admissions Test). It's hard. No matter how much I studied, the "Games" section always kicked my buttocks (don't let the name of the section deceive you). After over 5 hours at a desk in Allen Hall, I returned home to watch Lord of the Rings with my wife. Ah, life is good. Oh to be LSATious no more.

The Claytons

2007-09-14T08:29:00.000-05:00

...just celebrated their one-month anniversary!!!

This semester, I am taking 12 hours of class but 3 hours of undergrad honors thesis research (which I haven't exactly started yet). I'm taking Louisiana History (which seems like history of Louisianaian cartography from the way it is taught), Internal Audit II (a.k.a. "study on your own for "pop" examinations throughout the semester), Advanced Cost Accounting (the art of making employees stick with budgets) and Interpersonal Communication (disclosing parts of your self-concept to random people in the hope they will become non-random people). I'm working about 17 hours per week in the Department of ISDS on campus, and I'm taking the LSAT (law school admission test) at the end of this month. Other than that, I'm doing Beta Alpha Psi and enjoying cooking when Amanda lets me!

This semester for Amanda is a bit nontraditional for a student, but it's awesome. She's interning with the Louisiana Department of Tourism filming historic and other sites of interest for the State. Today she's actually editing her footage in New Orleans. Since some people have asked, No, she is not commuting to Loyola. It's wonderful that she's able to work downtown here in Baton Rouge at the Capitol, except for when she has to go on a film shoot across the State (funded by the State, though). She also gets a monetary stipend, which is terrific, and takes one class on Fridays, per her internship requirement.

Amanda and I are both graduating in May 2008. We are having a Bible study in our apartment Mondays at 7:30 p.m. (so if you're reading this, comment on this post if you want to come and I'll give you directions). We are both involved with Louisiana Students for Life at the state level and are planning the statewide conference to be held October 27-28 (register at http://www.lastudentsforlife.com/). We both are getting tired of "how's married life?", but smile and say all that can be reasonably said: "Wonderful!" But the attention is nice, I suppose.

The truth is we are loving married life. I haven't forced Amanda to start up her own blog, so I can only continue to share my own thoughts, so I will do that now.

Of course, that's one blessed thing about marriage, that my thoughts are not just my thoughts any more. There really is an intimacy of thought exchange that occurs, which is inexplicable, but true. Amanda and I have always been complimented on being a "cute" couple, but that does not result from being carbon copies of each other. We both have similar passions, goals and hopes, but very different ways of going about and communicating these to each other and to people. Our head-over-heels love for each other has taken on a new element of learning to communicate better. And somehow, through the intimacy of communication, we have started to complete each other's thoughts and statements. This didn't always come naturally pre-marriage, but it's something I've noticed just in one month of being together.

Sex is delectable and even celestial. Now I really am a proponent of the belief that sexual intercourse existed in God's original pre-Adamic fall Eden, albeit in a more perfect state, which I find both hard to believe and entirely probable.

There are all these rituals of love that come along with marriage. There's the process of learning how to say goodbye in the morning (and in somewhat time-reasonable manner), figuring out how much cleaning we do in the evenings, understanding when the other person wants to go to sleep, spending a half-hour recollecting the many happenings of our separate days one we coalesce at the day's end.....

And I know I speak for both of us when I say that we cannot get enough of each other. Just because we see each other every day does not take away our desire to be one. With friends, I felt I could always "get my fill" of someone through a hearty conversation and be able to go a week or so (fill in the blank with appopriate measure of time). Not so with my wife. I think about her all the time during the day and long to know the innermost of her thoughts at that moment. I've never enjoyed cleaning my place of residence so much. There really is the idea of keeping the "nest" clean and tidy, like both of us want our abode to be a representation of who we are as one unified couple.

There are newfound frustrations as well. She could only roll her eyes when I informed her one evening that I would not join her in the land of slumber until I had first cleaned the dishes and done something I had started on the computer. But this is where the love of God comes in. Where we both once did whatever we desired, we now are learning to compromise, which is what marriage often is, one big compromise.

The two best things about marriage, for me, are the companionship and intimacy of the heart. Companionship is easy for anyone to understand, so I won't explain that. But intimacy of the heart is, I guess, this feeling that no matter if I rose or fell during my day, was liked or disliked, succeeded or fell, it doesn't matter. Because Amanda's heart will provide the nurture and confidence I need. And vice versa.

Oh and one other thing. We're finding it's important to stay physically active and not get lazy. Therefore I'm back in the weightroom with Patrick, Recka and Michael (Pat's friend from law school), and Amanda is working out, too, and looking to play intramural soccer. Racquetball is our favorite thing to play together.

The Life and Times of a Married Man

2007-08-26T13:00:00.000-05:00

Amanda and I's honeymoon was the best time I can ever remember having in my 21 years of life. We were in Ontario, Canada for a whole week.

The evening of our wedding we stayed at the Ritz Carlton, a five-star hotel in downtown New Orleans. It was beautiful. We flew out of New Orleans the next day, a Sunday, to Buffalo, New York. We were supposed to rent a car there, but the Avis representative explained that there is an extra $110 surcharge per day for renters under the age of 25, per New York law. After speaking with a manager and getting very livid about the fact the Avis representative never told me this several months earlier, Amanda and I decided to take a taxi into Niagara Falls, Ontario and rent a car in Canada the next day, to avoid the New York law.

The gentleman at the Best Western in Niagara was actually kind enough to give us a honeymoon suite for free, including a voucher for breakfast and a heart-shaped jacuzzi! The next day Amanda and I got our PT Cruiser car rental and took a trip to the Falls. We took a boat ride on the Maid of the Mist, which goes right next to the falls and saturates the riders with mist. That afternoon we drove four hours to Collingwood, Ontario, on the bottom of Blue Mountain and on the shore of the Georgian Basin, which empties into Lake Michigan. We checked into our room at the lodge, a cozy cabin-ish room with a hammock on the back porch.

For the rest of that week Amanda and I mainly enjoyed each other's company alone, separate from the rest of existence. Other than that, we did a few activities...

On Tuesday, we went to Wasaga Beach. We walked about 1/8 mile out into the waters of Nottawasaga Bay, and still the water had not reached our knees. We eventually turned back because it was a little bit creepy being so far from shore, though the water was eerily shallow.

On Wednesday, we did an "Ecoadventure Tour." This included scenic cave exploration, a walk across a shaky suspension bridge over a gorge, and an hour-long treetop walking tour. Yes, that's right. Treetrop walking tour. We navigated a trail of rope bridges at heights of up to 60 feet in the top of the forest canopy.

Thursday was a day trip into Toronto, the capital of Ontario. I was surprised at several things about this metropolis: the cleanliness, the abundance of trees, the lack of any significant number of skyscrapers, the cars that would stop and park right in the middle of traffic downtown, the numerous bicyclists, and the multiculturalism. Amanda and I went to the top of the CN Tower, the world's tallest free-standing man-created structure. We ate dinner in the slowly spinning restaurant that gave us a great view of Lake Ontario and the area.

Friday was hiking day. Up the side of Blue Mountain. We got some beautiful camera shots!

Canadian cowboys showed us the landscape as we went horseback riding on Saturday. I rode Brumby and Amanda rode Mac. We got a chance to "lope," between a trot and a gallop. It is the fastest I've ever been on a horse. It's quite a scary and invigorating experience.

Sunday we returned home. That left us to a week of married life back in reality in Baton Rouge, Louisiana.

We've done a number of things this week: Amanda started working at the Department of Tourism, I assembled Wal-Mart furniture for our apartment, we cleaned cleaned cleaned, shopping shopping shopping, Chi Alpha events, Louisiana Students For Life events, helping friends move, I took a trip back to Slidell to get the rest of my belongings, reconnecting with friends, getting ready for the school year.

Married life is wonderful. The best thing is that whatever our days are like, Amanda and I come home to each other, another person we love and respect, another person we know will respect and cherish us for who we really are. The mundane things I've always done grudgingly have been really fun: laundry, cooking, sleeping patterns, figuring out what to wear, (this shouldn't be mundance but) seeking God, and the list goes on.

Something we are proud of is that God gave us the grace to, through matrimony, offer the virginity and purity of our bodies and minds to each other exclusively. Let doubters beware; the grace of God is still alive in this age. Let believers rejoice and walk the straight and narrow path with lightened loads.

People ask me if it's weird being married. I just shrug and let them know it feels very natural. Amanda and I are as we have always been. Just a little bit happier and lot more complete.

Our new bed from Mattress Direct after delivery.

Photo, courtesy of Jacob Benda, friend and former groomsman.

The Life and Times of a Groom

2007-08-24T13:34:00.000-05:00

My wife is currently taking a well-deserved repose in the other room. It seems much has happened in the last 2 weeks.

On the night of August 10th, I slept about 5 hours, which is much more than I thought I would get the night before getting married. I awoke quite calmly and went and lay out on the living room couch, thinking, "This is the day." I proceeded to take a long bubble bath, followed by the world's most precise and cautious shave. I expected a regular breakfast, but lo and behold, my dad had decided to get Subway sandwiches. After a repast, I gathered up all the elements of my white groom outfit and put them on one by one. The long dress shirt, the tie, the vest, the pants, the socks, the shoes, the coat. And then it was off to Covington, Louisiana to Vintage Court, the site of Amanda and I's marriage and wedding reception. As my dad drove, I prayed and sang praises to God on this glorious morning.

I arrived at PJ's Coffee, right down the road, and few of the groomsmen and I waited for the "green light" to proceed to Vintage Court. Apparently, the bride was taking pictures, and most of us hopefully know that it is a big faux pas for the groom to see the bride in her wedding gown before the processional. As I nervously paced around I took two phone calls, one from a groomsmen who was running late, another from a violinist who had to cancel because of unfortunate sickness. I took a deep breath and realized that if all else failed today, if Amanda, my father and me were there, everything would be fine. Today was the day I would declare to the world my intentions to husband for all time this woman who is the love of my life.

Eventually we were phoned in to come. I energetically shook a few hands before taking my place up at the front and to the side. Soon the processional music started. Amanda and I's grandparents, followed by our mothers proceeded down the aisle, with our mothers both lighting a taper unity candle. This was my father and I's cue to walk to the front and center of the beautiful altar.

Let me set the scene. When you drive down the roadway to Vintage Court, it is a typical southern Louisiana scene. Oak tree groves and beautiful flower beds greet you. When you walk in the front door, there is a small reception area, which opens up into the main hall, a long aisle with windows on each side, leading to the main seating area and altar at the opposite end. The sanctuary forms a cross, actually. Over the center of the cross is a beautiful chandelier with white ribbons. At the altar there are two brightly burning candleabras, marble steps leading up, and there my father and I stand.

Here come the bridesmaids and there escorting groomsmen. The best man, Matthew Clayton, and the maid of honor, Valerie Mautz, are first. Then come Jacob Benda and Betsy Sihvonen, David Mautz and Laura Post, and Zechariah Brewer and Hannah Clayton. Next an adorable site, my brother and sister, John and Jessica, the ring bearer and flower girl. John is bearing both the rings on a pillow and Jessica, with a curious smirk on her face, is gently sprinkling flower petals.

I looked at my father, the minister, and turned with a lump in my throat as the music once again changed. At the far end stood Amanda and her father. I could already feel my pulse quickening as I could tell from this great distance that once she got up to the altar, I would be gazing upon the most beautiful sight I had ever seen. As she reached the altar I walked down the steps to greet her and both our faces lit up in gorgeous, goofy grins. "Who gives this woman to be married to this man?" the minister bellowed out. "Her mother and I do," my father-in-law calmly said. Removing her veil, he shook my hand and placed his daughter's hand in mine. I led her up to the altar, where we turned 45 degrees from each other and we both smiled until we turned red.

From thence there was a welcome, a presentation, an opening prayer, a message about the unity of marriage and the body of believers, the exchange of vows, the giving and receiving of rings, the lighting of the unity candle, our parents praying for us at the altar, an altar call, a wedding song by John Roger and Deanna Bell, the Lord's Supper, pronouncement, and the recessional. Amanda and I were very proud of the ceremony, because we wrote the entire script ourselves 3 months before its realization. The minister gave a powerful word of exhortation and encouragement to us, that our marriage was a symbolic represenation of the marriage between Christ and His church. The altar call was a call to salvation through Christ, and the Lord's Supper was offered to all believers, who wished to partake. For this is something important to Amanda and I: the unity of God's people.

The entire time we were up there, Amanda and I kept glancing from the minister back and forth to each other, with large smiles on our faces. It is the giddiest feeling I can ever remember having in my life. My eyes devoured every inch of Amanda in her dress, as her eyes continually greeted mine with shouts of adoration. I was also glad to have a handkerchief for my forehead because the air conditioning sporadically went out. When the ring bearer brought the rings to me, I was so nervous, I tried handing Amanda her ring to put on me. This led to a moment of laughter at the altar (there were many others, as well).

The kiss at the altar was the slowest and most relaxed we have ever had. After we walked down the aisle as husband and wife, the blur known as a wedding reception began. We had to quickly sign the marriage license copies, as well as take dozens of photographs inside and outside. By the time we actually joined the reception, I was already tired. But that quickly turned into a rush of emotion. Hug after hug, congratulations after congratulations. People that I see every day at college began to become unrecognizable as I greeted more people than I ever have before in my life. Amanda and I had our first dance to David Crowder Band's "Stars," and then I danced with my mother as she danced with her father. We cut the cake, drank from our sparkling grape juice glasses, fed each other cake, had the bouquet and garter toss, talked ate a tiny bit whenever we had time, took pictures, talked some more, danced (mainly Amanda), and before we knew it, Amanda was telling me, "your brother's got the getaway car in place, we have to go soon!" And I honestly could not believe that nearly four hours at Vintage Court had passed.
We walked down the outside steps amidst cheers and many wedding bubbles and I helped her into the car, as I drove away, honking. I remember thinking, "That happened way too fast."

But we were headed for our first evening of marriage to the Ritz Carlton in New Orleans, a five-star hotel. And the only people who knew this were our parents. And then we dropped off the face of the map for a week, and entered a paradise of love.

Note: These pictures, courtesy of Laura Post. These are just a few photos to give readers a general idea of the look of the occasion. Professional photographs will follow when available.

Phase 2

2007-08-11T01:23:00.000-05:00

So this blog is about to enter Phase 2 of its existence. The Life and Times of Joshua Clayton Blog is now just over 3 years old, but it has only just begun.

In about 12 hours I will be professing my lifelong commitment to the lovely Amanda Mautz.

We're going to the chapel and we're gonna get ma-a-aried! We'll be honeymooning in Ontario, Canada for a whole week. So my blog will be taking a break...but I will not. I can't promise when I will return with a fresh post, but when I do, be sure I will have lots of wonderful things to share with Cyberworld.

Peace out.

August Evenings

2007-08-09T00:46:00.000-05:00

My friend Sheralyn and I hugged each other and gave a final farewell in a blistering hot underground subway station on the hottest day of the year in New York. I had already said so many goodbyes last Friday. I was not sure whether or not I should rejoice at the job offer from Deloitte or weep at the imminence of telling New York goodbye.

As I surfaced at Broadway and 116th for the last time, I began to feel the surges of emotion in my chest. I walked toward the Hudson and found Riverside Park, which I somehow never discovered until the last evening in the city. I began to realize how much a city can have a personality. I felt like New York is a person, one I will miss very much. I found myself thinking and God interrupting them to have a conversation. "Won't such a great city as this have any great words spoken about it in eternity?" You know the answer to that, my son. "I just want to remember this place because I'm sad I'll have to leave it." Why would you trade the glory of eternal things for something that breaks your heart? And this is what we always love to do: become fond of things that will break our hearts.

Before bed, I had a final coffee in the city, this time with my friend Maria. We left and talked about life, God, pain, and family amidst a mighty lightning storm on the way back. A few hours later I was riding the M60 bus early Saturday morning, wistfully looking through the city streets for the last time. By the time I was in line to go through security procedures, my mind had completely changed topics. Now for the real thing. A young lady who was more real than a city, more real than a summer, more real than anything I've ever known before. Waiting for me to come home so we can make our steadfast love known to the world.

My plane arrived back in New Orleans shortly before noon. Amanda picked me up, and as I told her I would, I said, "I am ready." She already had a picnic lunch prepared for me and we ate at Sunset Point in Mandeville on Lake Pontchartrain. Immediately, I was adjusting to the silence so different from the constant clamor I'd heard in the big city for over two months straight.

It was my 21st birthday, so I wasn't surprised when Amanda pulled out a package. Carefully wrapped inside was a brand new MP3 player. We listened and danced to a couple songs she had downloaded onto it already, including our first dance for the wedding. Then a lyric from a song came on that said, "We should make jerseys, 'cause we make a good team..." She quickly produced two white tee shirts and tempera paints and we made ourselves matching shirts. (I have to say that look good enough to be sold in Aeropostale. They turned out well.) Later she took me to Trey Yuen, where we had our first "official dinner" date not two years ago. All I can say is, I felt much more relaxed and peaceful this go-round! I think she would agree.

Since then, this week has been crazy. Getting the marriage license, finalizing the ceremony, finalizing the music, making multiple trips to Baton Rouge to move into and clean our new apartment, buying furniture, buying clothes, seeing Betsy and Ryan's little baby James...

Tomorrow I have a final tux fitting and a bachelor party to coordinate and attend. Then Friday, time with Clayton and Mautz relatives, a rehearsal and rehearsal dinner, and packing for a honeymoon in Ontario, Canada.

Saturday morning, I intend to take a tub bath, eat a relaxed breakfast, and then put on a white tuxedo with boyish enthusiasm.

And then comes a beautiful woman, the love of my life, wrapped in pure white garments, walking down the aisle toward me. Her father will remove the veil, we will stand to face the altar together, and...

Seoul Food

2007-08-02T21:23:00.000-05:00

Yes, New York has its own "Koreatown." On 32nd Street, between 6th and 7th Avenues. Two girls from LSU invited me to have Korean barbeque with them in Koreatown a week ago. It was an amazing experience!

From left to right, Me, EunSun Lee, Fei Lin.
I call EunSun "Debbie." It's her American name. Debbie and I have become great friends this summer and have been able to work on the same client for a couple weeks. Debbie is super cool and I am so blessed to have super friends like her!

Broadway

2007-07-31T08:24:00.001-05:00

I saw my third and final broadway show, Mamma Mia!, in New York for the summer, this Sunday afternoon with Geralyn and her two roomates, Kristina and Megan. Overall, I enjoyed aspects of all three of them.

Mamma Mia! is definitely the "chick flick" of Broadway shows. Taking place in Italy, it involves the wedding of a young girl who wants her father to walk her down the aisle. Raised by a single mother her whole life, she finds her mother's diary shortly before the wedding and discovers from several journal entries that there are three possible men who could be her father. Without her mother knowning, she invites all three, and the comedy begins as she sets about finding her real dad. Ultimately this play had some funny and heartfelt moments, but overall fell a little short because of its constant reliance upon strictly songs from the musical group Abba and various sexual references. Ultimately the theme meanders amongst such topics as fond remembrance of youthful revelry, the independence of women, and the responsibility of fatherhood. Though carried out through somewhat sloppily contrived dialogue, these themes are surprisingly heartfelt and, at times, even teary-eyed, with plenty of of time left over for giggles. The strength of the show is in its efficient yet attractive set transitions and props, as well as glamorous blue, purple, and bluish-green lighting effects. It has its moments, but don't go alone or with less than 50% of your group being female. 5/10

Les Miserables is said to be the longest running broadway show, and it's obvious why. It is brilliant. Based on the classic novel by French author Victor Hugo, the play, like the book, stays true to the various intertwining plot lines of many characters during the era of the Napoleonic wars and shortly thereafter. Jean Valjean is the convict who redeems himself by acts of charity. Fantine is the terminated factory employee who becomes a prostitute to survive and bears a child later rasied by Valjean. This child, Cosette, later marries a revolutionary college student in arms, who is also saved from death by Cosette's guardian, Valjean. And so on and so forth, the plot lines weave to create a masterful piece of storytelling that grips at the heartstrings. I cannot stress how much this play was profoundly emotional. One thing that impressed me is that every character has a different method of singing and a recurring musical theme that correlates directly with his or her personality. There is only one line in the whole play that is not sung, so this is definitely your traditional through-and-through musical. It was a little long, at almost 3 hours, but definitely worth the time. The dull lighting of this often dreary (though at just the right moments sparsely lighthearted) show is not dulling to the senses, for the set pieces constantly change. Such simple creativity as having the stage turn in a circle while a character runs, bringing in new scenery, gives the impression of travel to new scenes. The play has it all: history, tragedy, a bit of comedy, romance, awe-inspiring vocal performances, lifelike props, and a marvelous orchestra. I definitely recommend this play to anyone: the family, the girlfriend, the guys from work, whoever! 9/10

Monty Python's Spamalot is, as the tagline says, "A new musical lovingly ripped off from the motion picture Monty Python and the Holy Grail." The plot includes.....Well, let's just say, "What does the plot not include?!" The opening scene involves Norwegian woodspeople slapping each other with fish, only to have the "director" run in and say they are acting out the wrong play. As you can imagine, from there, the plot line and much verbatim dialogue from the movie creates the hilarity that Python fans (such as myself) are expecting. As the characters take up their God-given quest to find the grail, the recurring theme seems to be poking fun at Broadway, including my favorite, "The Song That Goes Like This." Be warned that this "esoteric class" humour pokes a bit of fun at many "untouchable" topics. For example, God (just as in the movie) tells King Arthur to stop grovelling just like in "those depressing Psalms"; Lancelot, in saving the girlish singing prince, discovers his own attraction to men; the dead and dying souls during the Black Plague are the object of humour; and Brave (cowardly) Sir Robin (who soils his pants upon seeing the killer white rabbit) sings an extended sequence of melodies stating that, in a Broadway, "You haven't got a thing unless you've got a Jew." This was my favourite of the 3 plays I saw. You just leave the theater feeling happy. It's very random and ridiculous, but thankfully so very random and ridiculous, that it affords the audience a complete eclipse of reality and a gratitude that our lives are not nearly as false as these fools parading around on stage with oversized cans of spam and Camelot casino chips. The dialogue is downright hilarious, and the acting is very, very talented. The stage designs are lavishly bright and beautiful, intentionally overdone to complete the surreal aura. The designs are also very witty, and there are lots of "ooh" and "ahh" moments, as when God's feet drop from the ceiling so He can have a chat with Arthur, and when the illustrious Lady of the Lake comes from beneath the watery habitat in a cloud of fog to give Arthur a sword. Also: there is crowd participation. To avoid giving away the surprise, I'll leave it at that. It isn't really family friendly, but it doesn't go further than a "PG-13." Might be offensive on several levels, the least of which being serious Broadway fans will feel they are the object of ridicule. 8/10

I Bid Thee Farewell

2007-07-28T12:54:00.000-05:00

As I saunter across your concrete in the burning hot
I think of all the times we have shared and all the times we have not
Thank you for the time but I’m about to say goodbye
Within seven days I’ll leave
And break your heart just like you broke mine
I’d leave you with a handkerchief with which to dry your eyes
But I know you have not got the heart to heave a sob and cry
Many the time I wanted to spend the night with you
But you would rather be with 10 million other people than with me
You’ve got grace, you’ve got charm, you’ve got godlike qualities
And yet you feed upon the misery of the oppressed and disenchanted
Though I will miss you, truth to be told
All the things we could have done
Some days I’ve hated you, others I’ve loved you
It’s undeniable you’ve always captured my imagination
Leaving me wanting you more and more but never satisfied
Your adrenaline is everything I crave and nothing I want to be
Your actions compose the lines to my amateur verse
Photographs of us together demonstrate
How much I really wanted to be with someone else
My dear, what’s going to happen next?
I’ll always be waiting for my train to come in
But it won’t break my heart to say goodbye.
In conclusion, fare well. I hope to see you again.

The Far East and Other Things

2007-07-23T07:02:00.000-05:00

[Composed yesterday]

The day began 30 minutes before my alarm was supposed to go off. Don’t you hate that? Oh well. It turned out to be a great day.

I went to church, as usual, and then I decided to go to Starbuck’s Coffee, for the second week in a row after church. As I sipped a raspberry mocha frap, I decided to finish off The Voyage of the Dawn Treader, the fifth of the Narnia books by C.S. Lewis. Just as I thought I remembered from childhood, this is my favorite of the seven books. My favorite part is the end of the book. In the story, it’s also the end of the world…and it’s so beautiful.

As the travelers come to a strange island with a “ginormous” table spread out with a king’s feast, an old man with a beard and silver hair down to his feet comes out and tells them the guests will be arriving shortly. They stand in awe, as the sun rises, for thousands of birds fly from the east, with the sun on their wings. They are sent daily to this, Aslan’s Table, to feast, as they sing an ethereal song, after which they fly back to Aslan’s land, the land beyond the sun, beyond the edge of the world. The travelers continue sailing eastward and as they do, the bottom of the sea becomes visible because the water is almost completely transparent. They can see an entire world under the sea, full of castles and roads where the mermaids and sea kings live. Reepicheep, the fighting mouse, gets rather excited when he has a draught of seawater and it tastes sweet. He remembers the prophecy given to him, “Where the waves grow sweet, doubt not Reepicheep, there is the utter east.” As they journey further, the water at the world’s end gets not deeper, but shallower and shallower, and the current pulls them ahead at light speed. The sun is so big that they are constantly bathed in white light. The utter end of the ocean is a vast sea of white lilies, “very hard to describe—sweet, yes, but not at all sleepy or overpowering, a fresh, wild, lonely smell that seemed to get into your brain and make you feel that you could go up mountains at a run or wrestle with an elephant. She and Caspian said to one another, ‘I feel that I can’t stand much more of this, yet I don’t want it to stop.’ “ What the book is attempting to depict is what I think it depicts so wonderfully, crossing into eternity.

I was interrupted from my reading by my party of friends, who had arrived. I joined them for brunch at a restaurant, and then left to go to the lower west side, south of Houston Street. I went to a place on the Hudson River that my roommate, Brian Quimby, had told me about. Floating the Apple is a volunteer group of water enthusiasts who let people use their kayaks to paddle around in the Hudson for free on weekends. I did that for about a half hour, and it was delicious fun.

After that I headed to the Financial District, to mail some letters at the post office, followed by a journey to the 2 subway stops down at Wall Street. I walked past the New York Stock Exchange, strangely silent compared to the chaos that will ensue tomorrow. And Trinity Church caught my eye. It’s such a big beautiful building, I figured I’d have a look inside.

Of course, once inside, I was awestruck by the beauty of the cathedral. I wondered out of the main chapel into its several halls and then…something happened that I did not expect. I saw a side room with a few chairs and hymnals, and a lavish altar, with a burning candle hanging above. I went to sit down, thinking I would flip through a hymnal. As I picked one up, the desire to pray came over me. I checked my emotion at first, not wanting to be pseudo-religious just because I’m being a tourist in some church building that, “No less,” I thought, “tread by common tourists all day.” But the feeling persisted. An urge to pray at that moment, and not put it off. I began to pray in the Holy Spirit and then…my prayers were turned to this nation, to my marriage, to my purpose on earth, to Amanda’s…I began to read silently aloud some of the old hymns and prayers and was rejoicing. A half-hour later when I left, I looked at one of the carvings on the door. It was glorious! It was the scene from Revelation where all the saints are casting down their crowns before Christ on the throne, with a great lion in the foreground.

I went to the Whitehall yellow line subway and rode it Times Square, where I returned to the Virgin Records megastore and looked through some music. Chevelle’s Wonder What’s Next for only $12.99 became irresistible once I let the opening track’s rift dance in my head for a while. So after purchasing it, I began looking for a plate for Amanda, who is collecting plates from various places she travels to. I did not find a satisfactory one and will have to try again elsewhere.

I just now finished up my 16-page paper, am e-mailing it. Thank goodness that won’t keep me up nights this week any more.

A Hot Dog From Hallowed Antiquity

2007-07-21T23:13:00.000-05:00

Today my friend Geralyn and I journeyed into Brooklyn. Here's a few pictures from Prospect Park and Coney Island.

On the Brink

2007-07-20T18:38:00.000-05:00

Monday's highlight for me was wrestling in a sumo wrestling suit, as part of a field day of sorts Deloitte held for all NY summer interns. I somehow weakly smacked the ball into the ground and got on first base with softball; got a few kicks across the field in soccer; and just stood on the sidelines for basketball. But fat man land was my forte. I crawled into a massive sumo wrestling suit and duked it out with another dude...and barely won. Notably all our team won was sumo and trivia. So I guess we could classify ourselves as a bunch of fat smart people.

Since then I have worked at Interpublic Group's office on Madison Avenue this week. Yes, that means I actually left Grand Central about 5 minutes after that massive steam pipe exploded nearby on that particular day. Overall, I enjoyed IBM better compared to this week. It's been good work, just a change of pace. I quality assessed the client's expense report system and for a proposal to a client, populated a rate card with foreign exchange rate conversions, as well as creating organizational charts and a globe graphic for the proposal. My good friend EunSun Lee has kept me company. She's also an LSU-er, and she's originally from South Korea. She introduced me to Koreatown a couple weeks ago. We went to Artisanal Bistro for NYC's "Restaurant Week" this week. Basically, overpriced fine dining places in the city lower their prices during this week to attract customers. The food was good...but the portions were miniscule. I had blue crab soup, salmon, and "berry soup" dessert.

And to light up my nights I've been working on a research paper. The one-week Internal Audit Case Studies course in presentations that I took back in May has a second part, a 16-page research paper to work on during the summer. I kind of waited to start till the beginning of last week, so I've been working a couple hours on that every night upon getting home from work. We have to do a report on each of the following 16 topics: COBOT Framework, Extensible Business Reporting Language, ISO 9000, ISO 14000, COSO Framework, CoCo Framework, Control Self Assessment, Total Quality Mangement, Six Sigma, Benchmarking, SAS 70, Reengineering, Foreign Corrupt Pratices Act, Securities Exchange Commission, Cadbury Committee, and King II Report. It is due Sunday at midnight.

For dinner this week, I made my 2 favorites! Chicken fajitas and spaghetti with ground meat and Ragu. I also interspersed a couple salads and frozen french bread pizzas for good measure. I have awakened to a bowl of the overpriced and delicious Blueberry Morning cereal every day.

My commute has been interesting this week. I catch a #1 train at 116th Street and ride that to 96th Street. There I transfer to the express, a #2 or #3, and take that to Times Square 42nd Street. Then I catch the "S" shuttle to Grand Central Station. Then I transfer to a downtown bound #6 local train and ride to 33rd street, get out and walk to Madison Avenue.

FYI, the Virgin Records megastore in Times Square is SWEET. I got 4 movies for $40: Empire of the Sun, The Matrix, The Manchurian Candidate (the real one with Frank Sinatra), and Black Hawk Down. I am still plowing through the massive 18 hours of extra material on the bonus Lord of the Rings discs. Seriously, it's taking me the whole summer to finish. I watch a half hour whenever I have time here and there.

Some favorite Biblical material this week has been Psalm 37 and some stuff in Luke. Luke 9:51-56 stands out in mind right now. A particular Samaritan village Jesus wants to minister in does not receive him into the village...at all. Not even entrance into the "village (or city) limits"! The disciples, infuriated, ask if they should call down fire from heaven to devour these heathens. "But," the Scriptures say "he turned, and rebuked them, and said, 'Ye know not what manner of spirit ye are of. For the Son of man is not come to destroy men's lives, but to save them.' And they went to another village." Listen to Jesus! Though he will not compromise the Truth the Father has commanded Him to bring to lost humanity, there are ramifications. He says, in essence, "My followers! Though sometimes pain must be brought upon the rebellious for the sake of justice, I delight in mercy. I will do whatever justice requires, but the Father's love in me would much rather use the vehicle of mercy. My purpose is not to do what you are suggesting. It is just the opposite!" Jesus came to save, not destroy.

What encouragement that brings to us, His beloved! To all humanity! He waits to the last possible moment, in mercy, until he brings judgment. He wants to save every one that can be, that will allow the process of being, saved. Of course, Christ's heart is broken. They "went to another village." Though Jesus won't force Himself on us, it is a pity if He has to walk elsewhere because we pull a gun on Him when he knocks on our door.

I have been obssessed with "Chasing Cars" by Snow Patrol, of late. Facilitating this is the fact I'm getting married in three weeks. The wedding planning is still going, and I am anxious just to be back with my lovely Amanda Marie. I am out of my mind right now...all I want is to walk down that aisle and say, "I do." It is high time. This summer has made me so much more confident. I know we can do this. I know by God's grace we can live a wonderful life. We've survived and thrived apart, so I know that we have the resources to live together and be mature. It was about this time a year ago we both awkwardly and gleefully discussed when exactly we would be getting married and we both had in our minds...what if we got engaged this winter and got married next year? And now here we are.

Am I scared?

No.

When you're ready to commit to someone, you're teetering on the edge of a cliff. The longer you keep yourself from the person, you risk falling over yourself. Through committing, you have the other person grasp your hand, kiss you rapturously, and say, "1...2...3...let's jump into the unknown together."

Eustace Has Become a Dragon

2007-07-15T16:24:00.000-05:00

There comes a time (if not times) in the life of every human being where we realize our demons are bigger than we can handle. Here is a bit of poetry I wrote some time ago when I discovered I had a monster inside of me.

A goblet to the sky

Toasting farewell to innocence.

Let the bells toll for us

The soon and future dead.

Regret and wrath take my hands

Scrape all these scales away

To red new skin.

All I wanted was to bleed

So you slashed my right hand

And kissed me on the right cheek.

Looking back

You look like hell

But it’s under your feet.

Can’t raise the dead

When I’m on the way

But never quite there

Though grown up so fast

To become a small man.

So what happens next?

But we all know the answer to that.

I’ll never feed the monster again

Then he’ll drown in my bitterest tears

My sweaty hands on your throat.

My sweat cleaned the hands water could not.

In Search of Strawberry Fields

2007-07-14T23:00:00.000-05:00

I set out at just before 4:00 p.m. to find Strawberry Fields, the area of Central Park named after the famous song "Strawberry Fields Forever" by John Lennon. I somehow passed the mythical place up, but found lots of enchantment along the way...

...

A winding path through a wooded area came out near a waterfall between a stone bridge and another bridge over a pond with willows weeping nearby.

The eerily beautiful song of some would-be goddess of the trees drifted from over the next hill. I curiously walked in the direction of the sad yet musical voice. I was stunned to come to a tunnel in the wood and find a young lady in a long, flowing dress walking around alone underneath, singing some sort of Siren-sounding song. I've heard a voice like that in the movies. Slightly operatic, slightly angelic, somewhere between beautiful and haunting, but closer to haunting. With a feignedly uninterested attitude, I walked past and seated myself on a rock, listening to her for several minutes.

I came across a vast lake in the very center of a city of 8 million people. In my mind, the skyscrapers above the trees at the water's edge faded from sight, and for a few seconds I was back in the South in some nondescript and hallowed tract of rural land.

I heard the sound of drums in the distance. Walking briskly, I came to a circle of spectators around an ensemble of world musicians with various percussion instruments jamming out. I then walked in the direction of some other strange sounds...

By a mighty fountain of dancing angels with cascading waters on their wings stood a lone man with a kilt playing the bagpipes. After listening to the wailing sound for a while I walked underneath a bridge and noted a man dressed in little but a loin cloth, dancing around burning incense, sing-screaming an eerie sound to the backdrop of violin trills...

The Mall. I read a plaque that explains the Park's construction began in 1858. I look around and see statues of various long-dead poets, including William Shakespeare and Robert Burns.

Because words often the best at failure, here are some pictures...

The Question "Why"

2007-07-13T15:38:00.000-05:00

For a friend who was once very sick...

Sorrow drops from my eyes

Weariness falls from your lips

Someone write me the lines to say

I can’t even speak with you

I’ll scream at the walls

And tell the devil to leave

Leave your body alone

Now you’re the one with clever words and light

I’m the one in shadows and doubt

If my fears came true

You’d be headed for heavenly realms

Don’t leave me in hell

Don’t go where I cannot follow

Your smile cut my sorrow for you in two

Leaving me behind in a world full of questions

You’re surrounded by infinite answers now

I remember when we would scream at the stars

Oh, I could never forget

Through your weakness we are strong

City of Blinding Lights

2007-07-12T21:13:00.000-05:00

Amanda and I's weekened in NYC 2 weeks ago...

A Day in the Life Of...

2007-07-09T21:37:00.000-05:00

7:06 a.m. Massaging scalp with Suave shampoo
7:31 a.m. Eating bowl of Cocoa Puffs
7:42 a.m. Struggling with awful Windsor tie knot
7:51 a.m. Cutting face with cheap Bic razor blade
8:09 a.m. Catch “1” subway train
8:16 a.m. Transferring to express “3” train
8:33 a.m. Wringing out sweat from back of undershirt
8:46 a.m. Swiping security badge in World Financial Center
8:58 a.m. Pouring cup of Hazelnut coffee
9:04 a.m. Catching up with a friend down the hall
9:11 a.m. Sorting through e-mails
9:28 a.m. Cleaning up IBM Report Archive e-Room
9:53 a.m. Returning SmartSpace phone call
10:06 a.m. Receiving mid-summer evaluation
10:25 a.m. Examining customer script output for WebSphere MQ
11:13 a.m. Merging Destin’s and my findings into master document
11:56 a.m. Chuckling at a “Your Mom” joke from Nikolay
12:21 p.m. Getting swept up in a massive move to South Tower Café
12:58 p.m. Contemplating why I eat a wrap, apple and soda every day for lunch
1:13 p.m. Re-creating Customer Opportunity Report
1:33 p.m. Reading Veljko’s face for signs of sarcasm
2:09 p.m. Creating Assisted Self Assessment workbook
2:58 p.m. Sniffing a warm cup of Mocha Nut Fudge coffee
3:33 p.m. Examining errors in my work for correction via Jan
4:01 p.m. Applying part numbers to another workbook
4:48 p.m. (finally) meeting Adam, recently returned from Europe
5:22 p.m. Misinterpreting Tom’s instructions and having a laugh at myself
5:34 p.m. Researching Excel tutorials for training
6:17 p.m. Meeting Destin’s friend on 9th floor (smelly place)
7:02 p.m. Buying bubble gum to break a five-dollar bill for change back at Columbia grocery store
7:29 p.m. Throwing laundry into washing machine
8:12 p.m. Moving weights up and down, in and out at Dodge Fitness Center
8:45 p.m. Making deli sandwiches in dorm
9:12 p.m. Checking Facebook
9:21 p.m. Talking to Mother
9:41 p.m. Sending out e-mails again requesting last few addresses to mail out wedding invitations
10:02 p.m. Checking online banking activity
10:16 p.m. Renewing driver’s license online
10:29 p.m. Hanging up laundry
10:45 p.m. Reading Bible
11:01 p.m. Calling a certain blonde-haired blue-eyed wonder whom I know…

A Broadway and the Beach

2007-07-08T20:40:00.000-05:00

Friday, I invited myself to the beach:

Eun-sun: Yeah, some of us from LSU are going to the Jersey beach...
Josh: Oh my gosh, I've been wanting to do that! Can I come?!

I awoke at 8:00 a.m. Saturday and took a train to Jersey City and met some people to head to Point Pleasant in lower New Jersey. There was Marcella, Michael, Lisa, Fei, Eun-sun, Allison, Katarina, and me. Everyone was from LSU except Katarina. I must say the most ridiculous thing about the drive was that New Jersey has so many tolls, and for such strange amounts, the lowest being five cents.

The beach was severely overcrowded and we had to pay $7.50 each to use it for the day, but it was well worth it. The water was icy cold but felt clean to the skin. I'm surprised I didn't burn with all the sunbathing minus lotion I did. The return trip took an eternity. We got back to Jersey City at midnight and then went to "Koreatown," a one block section near Penn Station full of Korean establishments. We ate some traditional Korean food and then I took my tired self to bed.

Besides the usual Sunday worship service, I added a Broadway in as well. Monty Python's Spamalot, "lovingly ripped off" of the movie Monty Python and the Quest for the Holy Grail. It was simply hilarious. It involved crowd interaction and lots of randomly absurd moments, which the Monty group is known for. It was truly one of my most enjoyable moments in New York, by far.

One more week on IBM this week. Mid-point evaluation tomorrow. Case study presentation to interns and a panel of partners Friday. Starting actual internal audit work with IPG next week.

Anberlin "Godspeed" Video!

2007-07-06T17:41:00.000-05:00

Anberlin's new music video for "Godspeed" just released! Watch it Here.

Picture from Anberlin's Myspace page at http://www.myspace.com/anberlin.

Worlds Apart

2007-07-06T15:07:00.000-05:00

It’s really something else when you miss home so much that home comes to pay you a visit.

I met my family right downstairs in the World Financial Center directly after work on Tuesday. There they were, in the food court! I excitedly embraced my father, then Hannah, Jessica, my mother, and John. I quickly and eagerly led them to the express subway on the red line, telling them little bits of information I had learned about this city I have come to call home for the past month. We stopped at the Famiglia famous New York pizza place to dine before going to a night service at Times Square Church. It was wonderful to all be there as a family at the church which has blessed so much over the years through having received sermons on tape, read profound newsletters in the mail, and been a part of extensive international missions work through financial giving. I have said enough about this church in past e-mails; needless to say, my family experienced it for the first time and loved it.

We then took an express train down to Park Place and boarded a PATH train to New Jersey. They have been staying this week right across the Hudson River in Jersey City at a Doubletree Hotel. This was my first time in Jersey this week. I have spent several nights with them, and it is refreshing as Jersey City is starkly less busy than its nearby bustling neighbor across the river.

Wednesday, July 4th, Independence Day, we all had a delicious breakfast downstairs and headed for midtown Manhattan where we slowly made our way through the mass of tourists to the 86th floor observatory of the Empire State Building. It was a little worrisome climbing this structure, knowing it was completed in only 13 months; but hey, it’s been around for almost a century, and it’s still standing, right?! Needless to say, it is the most amazing view of NYC imaginable. You can look out to the south and see the tip of Manhattan, with the massive, postcard-worthy Financial District skyscrapers standing proudly. Out to the west is Jersey City with its similarly impressive skyline. To the north, Central Park looks like a thick and enchanted forest, and to the east Manhattan and Brooklyn Bridge lead the way to Brooklyn and Queens.

Afterward was the shopping. Macy’s and F.A.O. Schwarz, a massive toy store. I took my parents back to Columbia University to show them around campus and let them peek in my dorm, which I was proud of, as it was reasonably clean. Then we had dinner at Deluxe on Broadway, before heading back across the border to New Jersey for some shut-eye.

Except, I lingered in Manhattan a little longer than the rest. I took a subway down to Wall Street and walked east to the East River to South Street Seaport to look out on the barge that would send up hundreds of fireworks as part of the Macy’s fireworks display, the largest in the nation. The 30-minute display was the longest I’ve ever seen; my only regret is that I do not have pictures to boast the beauty of the display. Every time I thought the zenith of amazement had been reached, a new trick would be unleashed. Bursts in the form of hearts, stars, smiley-faces. Even jellyfish shaped explosions that slowly floated up from the barge in medusa form. It was a very pleased and enthusiastic crowd that left the seaport that evening.

Today I worked until 5 p.m. and met my family in Central Park. They had gone to the Museum of Natural History during the day. We decided to venture into Chinatown for dinner. I thought to myself how ashamed I was that I had not once ventured into Chinatown (or Little Italy) for that matter since I have been here. We had to take the blue, red and yellow lines to Canal Street to go to Jing Fong, a restaurant my mom had read about in a book. It’s one of those places that is a “find”; you’d never guess it’s a decent place to eat from the outside. But once inside, you take an escalator to a second floor ballroom…and “Bam!”, you’re in Hong Kong, seemingly.

It felt a bit goofy and awkward because there was only one other table seated in this huge second-floor restaurant. Another large family, this one Chinese, was busy eating dinner. We were this massive and funny-acting American family seated and watched by the 10 or so servers standing there gawking idly because of lack of business on this Thursday night. Several wet washcloths were quickly dispatched to the table. I chuckled to myself as my dad looked around for a place to put his, settling for his lap, while the kids twirled them in the air and I demonstrated its proper use, wiping of the hands before dinner. But there endeth my knowledge of the Hong Kong way.

We all ordered our own separate dishes…or so we thought.

My dad’s was the first one out onto the table, and he proceeded to take a bite. The owner came out and with a quizzical brow asked, “Are you going to share any with your family?” My dad, thinking this a joke (as did we all), smiled sweetly and said, “Haha, no!” The owner, looking amusedly puzzled said, “Oh but it is Hong Kong way. You American family different from Chinese family.” Realizing quickly that we’re all expected to share each other’s dinners, we cheerily laughed at ourselves and my dad, being the outgoing man of the hour, continued to converse with him.

I had to insist Jessica stop stabbing and chasing the food around her plate with chopsticks and (for Heaven’s sake), Please, use the fork. I was especially adept to spilling the warm and inviting but tasteless tea. I started to wonder why I had ordered squid and pork stomach with peppers, when my family had ordered the more well-known poultry dishes. Sometimes, taking risks is profitable. This time, it wasn’t. That squid and pork belly was an exercise in redefining edibility. Everything else was beyond delicious, though.

As I write, my family is probably exploring the Financial District, and I have already told them farewell.

It is a strange mix of emotions at this point. Seeing Amanda and now my family makes me miss home, but then I honestly must say I might tear up when I have to leave New York. I really love this city and some of the people I have met here are amazing.

And by amazing I mean: inspiring, professional, ridiculous, multitalented, and in some cases bust-a-gut hilarious.

Big Old Jet Airliner

2007-07-02T19:00:00.000-05:00

Friday afternoon, as the sun was descending, and my friend Destin and I were training our engagement team on WebSphere MQ, my head drifted away from the meeting room. As several people slowly sipped a beverage or two at happy hour, my senses grew impatient, anxious to go see her immediately. Eventually my senior manager was leaving, so I went with him, giving the party the slip. I hurried back to the corner of 116th and Broadway to meet the young lady who had just made the flight from New Orleans to NYC's famous LaGuardia Airport.

As I hung up the mobile phone and spied Amanda tentatively stepping off the M60 bus across the street, I waited for the light to change, staring across the street at her wielding a goofy smile. At the street corner, two deep sighs of relief, two huge grins, an awkward moment of silence, a kiss, a laughter and a clamour. Hurriedly I introduced my bride-to-be the nuances of Columbia University. Walking past where Peter Parker calls Mary Jane from the pay phone, I chattered her ear off. At last.

Her flight had been late, so time only merited a quick deli sandwich and iced tea on the go, as I got her a Metrocard and hopped on a #1 train toward Times Square. At the AMC Empire 25 theatre, we went up 6 or so floors to the same-day released Ratatouille. The showing was sold out, so it was a good thing I had purhased tickets ahead of time. We were relegated to the very front row. Therefore, the little animated rats and French chefs of the movie threatened to jump right on top of our heads for the duration of the film. After that, we tried New York's famous Famiglia pizza and wandered around Times Square at the nearby areas, with the missus admiring the city's grandeur and bright lights.

The next morning after many happy conversations and very few hours of sleep, Amanda put on her black dress and I my trousers,shirt,andtie. We hopped a subway to Columbus Circle, walked a few blocks, and settled on a lovely spot outside Josephina, a French restaurant. After a hearty meal and explanations of many things (including software compliance), we were off again to the Broadhurst Theatre. We quickly took our seats and prepared for a wonderful Broadway, Les Miserables. I struggled to stay awake the whole time, Amanda smacking me around lovingly to help me. (It had been a long night of little sleep Thursday night, you see, followed by a romantic night out and about of yet again no sleep, as the next 2 nights would also be.) It was a pity I was so tired; because the musical was brilliant. The characters were compelling, the set design was creative and lively, and the songs were ethereal. Plot? Eh...very complex. Basically a convict from prison changes who he is and adopts the daughter of an poor prostitute and raises her, amongst other events such as the French Revolution. Gripping tale.

Later we ate Mister Softee ice cream, strolled through the mountainous Morningside Park near Columbia and walked through beautiful wooded areas and over bridges in Central Park, concluding with a nighttime devotion on a park bench. My brain fails to recall whether or not we went to the Toys R Us, M & M and Hershey's stores in TS that day or the next. We ended up by chance at another outdoor French restaurant late at night, Maison. I actually tried ratatouille, a vegetable dish. Not too shabby at all. Very tasteful, I recommend it.

Sunday morning we went to Times Square Church, which I think Amanda geuninely enjoyed. Afterward I took her to Chelsea's restaurant in Hell's Kitchen for brunch. Then off to Central Park for a stroll and a siesta in the sun, your must-do Sunday couple activity. Then I took her way down south, to the Financial District, and let her marvel at the West Hudson River and the office building I work at. The evening allowed time for a Staten Island Ferry ride, which afforded us a gale of a breeze, a beautiful sunset over the Jersey shoreline, and a silhouetted Lady Liberty.

To cap things off nicely, we went to Mars 2112, a special eating experience at 51st and Broadway. You go down into this basement of a building and are greeted by people in outer-space Star-Trekkish suits. They tell us "earthlings" to get inside the "ship" a 10-minute space simulator ride to Mars. We get off and are told the temperature is a ridiculously cold one and walk through several hallways that are decorated like Martian tunnels. We are seated in a large room that looks like the Martian landscape, full of holograms on the walls and dancing aliens across the restaurant floor. Our waiter says, "Greetings earthlings would you like a Martian appetizer" or something else silly like that. Amanda and I made sure to get some pictures with a jolly old chap, a blue alien with a knack for giving the "thumbs-up" and doing the "moon walk".

This morning seeing Amanda off to the bus station, as I joined my friend Destin on the subway, I glanced back over my shoulder to catch her eyes briefly. Her sweet smile suddenly was eclipsed by the top of the stairs I had just descended. I sighed deeply, rejected my free copy of the A.M. New York, and thought to myself of the time some 30-some days from now I would get off a plane in New Orleans and tell her, "I am ready."

Staten Island Ferry

2007-06-24T21:59:00.001-05:00

American Museum of Natural History

2007-06-24T18:31:00.000-05:00

Running to Stand Still

2007-06-22T22:22:00.000-05:00

So I might have discovered how working changes people. Some college students who were less outgoing will be made extremely socialized people by their entry into the workforce. Others who were more talkative will find that the repetitive nature of their everyday lives produces less to talk about than before. I think I’m a little mix of both, but primarily in the latter category.

Therefore I feel less and less need to tell Blogworld about the everyday things I am doing…working, exercising, cooking, etc. I think college students can be infamous for being passionate about Nothing. It is because they have Nothing to talk about or do that is contributing to reality. We have a lot of theories and aspirations but haven’t applied any of it yet. This is why I don’t want to be in school forever.

Sure, for a time it’s fun to be able to have a small part-time job and then the rest of the day walk around with a pocket copy of a New Testament, or a Silmarillion, or an Aristotelian Ethics or whatever the case may be and philosophise with other aspirant youth. But there comes a time when creativity is stifled by having been in the womb for too long. Birthing must occur.

I think that, therefore, college students (such as myself) who find themselves in the monotonous world of The-Rest-Of-My-Life-Doing-Some-Variants-Of-The-Same-Thing need to find ways to stay passionate about what first drove them in the glory days. After work, pick up Tolkien, pick up Epicurus, pick up Galilei, pick up Charles Spurgeon. And use that as fuel for conversation, for making the need to work and survive become significant within a larger context.

For the Christian that task becomes necessarily all the larger and more rewarding.

Last night Deloitte drove us up to Bear Mountain in upstate New York. Today from 7 am til 3 pm we did team-building activities, including but not limited to building go-karts with PVC pipe and constructing team rafts and paddling across the water in a region of beautiful trees, sprawling mountains and bluegreen lakes.

I would like to thank a number of people for making this week rewarding and worth living:

Thanks to Geralyn Suhor for constantly checking up on me to ensure I am eating well and enjoying my job properly.
Thanks to Destin Harcus, whose humor makes the workday pass with the utmost of ease.
Thanks to Sheralyn Briggs for being the most pleasant person I have met in the Northeast and always brightening up my day.
Thanks to Steven Mai for being ridiculous and letting me use the Jacuzzi in his suite last night and attempting to teach me card tricks and Texas Hold ‘Em.
Thanks to my roommate Brian Quimby for a quick wit that always keeps me on the edge of my desk seat.
Thanks to Jarrett Cohen for his infectious laughter and sincere storytelling.
Thanks to Zechariah Brewer for teaching me the value of friendship across thousands of miles.
Thanks to Leigh, (whose name I am probably misspelling) for making the bus ride pass more quickly and teaching me to act like a Northerner with grace and ease.
Thanks to Eun-sun Lee for always being herself and being a steady individual.
Thanks to Velcojk Andric for teaching me that Bosnians are so fun, you definitely want one as your best friend.
And thanks to Amanda Mautz, who chose to change her already-amazing last name to make me the happiest man in the Cosmos.

Christmas in July

2007-06-20T22:26:00.000-05:00

Guess who's coming to visit me in New York City at the end of the month!

Live for today
We'll dream tomorrow
We've got big plans in sight
We'll take this city and by nightfall...
The bright lights are calling

Everything is going our way
Everything is just as we've planned
This is our future (from what we've heard)
And I've still got your hand

And it feels like we could last forever
And I'm not doing this alone

When memories fade
We've got each other
When time and confusion collide
Singin' I hold it all when I hold you
When friends walk other ways
We've got each other
I hold it all when I hold
I hold it all when I hold you

We fell on hard times
This isn't the ideal
We're miles from home
Doing the best that we can (best that we can)

I won't do this without you
I won't do this without you
So take heart...
'Cause you know that you have mine

And it feels like we could last forever
And I'm not doing to do this alone

It's not about the money we make
It's about the passions that we ache for
What makes your heart beat faster
Tell me now what does your body long after
I don't care now where we live
It's not where, or what, or who we were with
I just need you in my life
So promise me again

--"Time and Confusion," Anberlin

Dimension Number Four

2007-06-19T19:20:00.000-05:00

Art is another world, a doorway into a existence whose higher reality is defined by the necessary nature of its inherent surreality. Here are a few images from a recent visit with friends to the New York Metropolitan Museum of Art, one of the finest art museums in the world.