Why Isn't God Listening?

The Word of the Lord in Isaiah 59: 1-4:

Behold, the Lord's hand is not shortened, that it cannot save; neither his ear heavy, that it cannot hear: But your iniquities have separated between you and your God, and your sins have hid his face from you, that he will not hear. For your hands are defiled with blood, and your fingers with iniquity; your lips have spoken lies, your tongue hath muttered perverseness. None calleth for justice, nor any pleadeth for truth: they trust in vanity, and speak lies; they conceive mischief, and bring forth iniquity.

I think the answer to the above question becomes self-evident at this point. Selah.

The Wisdom of Gandalf

From Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring, by J.R.R. Tolkien:

"But last night I told you of Sauron the Great, the Dark Lord. The rumours that you have heard are true: he has indeed arisen again and left his hold in Mirkwood and returned to his ancient fastness in the Dark Tower of Mordor. That name even you hobbits have hard of, like a shadow on the borders of old stories. Always after a defeat and a respite, the Shadow takes another shape and grows again."
"I wish it need not have happened in my time," said Frodo.
"So do I," said Gandalf, "and so do all who live to see such times. But that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us. And already, Frodo, our time is beginning to look black. The Enemy is fast becoming very strong. His plans are far from ripe, I think, but they are ripening. We shall be hard put to it. We should be very hard put to it, even if it were not for this dreadful chance.
The enemy still lacks one thing to give him strength and knowledge to beat down all resistance, break the last defences, and cover all the lands in a second darkness. He lacks the One Ring."

A Newfound Sensitivity

On the way to Loyola, actually while at the Greyhound bus station, I talked to a random girl about bus schedules and such. She was an LSU student, but I didn't know any more about her than that. I couldn't help but wonder if she was on the same mission as I...
...and sure enough, upon our arrival in New Orleans, she was greeted by a young man who ardently embraced her. I watched them walk off together, blissfully ignorant of everything around them. A smile crept upon my face as I contemplated seeing my girl within the hour...
2 days later, after a wistful goodbye to Amanda, back at the bus station, lo and behold. I see the same couple together. I watch him kiss her goodbye, with half a smile and half an anxious frown. As watches her walk away and she cranes her neck backward to get a last look of her Love (for quite some time I assume), I catch her attention and timidly wave. I'm sure she remembered me from a couple days ago, although she probably didn't know why I making the pilgrimage to New Orleans. Then again, maybe she did...
As I looked around, I thought, "You've got to be kidding me." In cinematic fashion, it seemed everyone around me on the Baton Rouge-bound bus was a couple kissing goodbye and gazing into each other eyes. It was probably only 3 or 4 couples, but I suddenly felt I knew these people, I knew their stories as if they were my own. I felt that same desperation...all of us were leaving thinking about the next time we would be in New Orleans. (And believe me, taking the Greyhound bus is a sign of being desperate. haha) And then there's the long ride home, carrying the emotional bottle of experiences, of memories...stored up till next time. All I know is that although I would have planned this differently...the term "long-distance relationship" is losing the negative connotation it once had. This period of my life is being used by God to sharpen me in many ways. And the distance that separates the one I love has matured my initial giddy feeling into one of committment and dedication that is more intense than any feeling I have ever known.

Working for the Weekend

Guess what? I'm at Loyola University right now. Guess why? Or Guess who? ...my Amanda Marie. Last week, the phrase "working for the weekend" took on a whole new significance.

Pep Talk to Myself

Come on, man. This is ridiculous. I mean, 12 hours of sleep in 3 nights (including naps)? You've got to do a little better than this. I'm disappointed in you. Don't give me any of this "I've got a busy life right now that won't let me sleep nonsense."

DUDE!

My Dad was in Baton Rouge on business today, so we got to hang out...and eat out. He also took me to the store and got me some essentials, as well as a new pair of pants.

The incredible thing is the special package he had for me. I haven't told anyone, but for the past month I've wanted a digital camera...really really really wanted a digi camera. My dad popped the trunk open, made me close my eyes. I fingered the box placed in my hands and opened my eyes to find a top-notch digital camera. I was speechless. Those of you who know me know that making me speechless is an accomplishment. I thanked him with a lump in my throat. How does stuff like that work out? When we delight ourselves in Christ...He has a way of communicating our secret desires to others and they end of blessing us. Looking forward to my career, I think I want money most not so I can have a comfy suburban lifestyle, but so that I can lavishly give to those I love...to my wife and children...so that I can moreover give to the kingdom of God. After all...the Bible says money answers all things. And what good is money if we can't lavish it on those we love? Money is a means to an end...which is why our society is jacked up. Money has become the end in and of itself. How tragic.

Anyway, I must go now and shower, do laundry, attend a business fraternity info meeting, and do homework and read the Bible and Tolkien (whoa, I don't know if all that's getting done)...so I can start using my camera tonight. And...cha-ching, now I can take like 3 million pictures of my Love when I go visit her this weekend! Aaaaah!!! Duuuude!

A Year of Tolkien

I finished The Hobbit Sunday. I'm currently on page 50 of 450 in Fellowship of the Ring. Hopefully I'll be able to get through the whole LOTR trilogy and The Simarillion by the end of this year. Actually, I'm glad I saw the LOTR movies first. Sure, there a few little discrepancies, but that New Zealand scenery implanted in my mind as a basis for imagination while reading the books? Aw, yeah baby, it's working well.

A Day in the Life of Bean

Yeah, so I figured out how to do this. Sunday afternoon through Friday afternoon, it's all strictly business. And that's literal because I am a Business major. I mean, near constant studying during the week, so that I can have guilt-free recreation Friday night and Saturday. I tried studying Chemistry last night (Friday). Yeah, that doesn't work when you're thinking about all the fun your friends are having (or hopefully are not having, because you are absent). So today (Saturday), I didn't pick up a textbook.

I woke up at noon.
Then I went with 30 other Chi Alpha guys to go eat chicken wings at Plucker's.
Then Scott, Jeff and I went to the men's basketball game to see LSU beat Alabama.
Then Scott showed me the art of playing Perfect Dark Zero for X-box 360 (a brilliant game for a brilliant system...with posh cordless controllers).
Then me and several friends ate at the Union for dinner.
Then I went and studied the Bible and prayed for a half-hour.
Then I called like 15 people and invited them over to Scott's place for a party (I'm getting good at inviting people over to someone else's abode).
Then we all played Catch-Phrase, Perfect Dark 360, and ate Cody's spaghetti.
Then I talked to my good friend John Collins, who is in D.C. for a pro-life convention.
And it was the end of my day that brought me greatest fulfillment. A phone conversation.

Yes, all these things were wonderful. But the end of the day allowed me to talk to the one who was on my mind all day.

There is no one in the world like, there is no earthly-born force on earth comparable to, no living, breathing, pulsating, material reason for living greater than ...my Amanda Marie. I'm going to publicly in webspace say it: I love you.

19-hour Semester

This will be interesting. And diverse. Accounting 3001, Management 3200, Chemistry 1422, Sociology 2o02, Spanish 1101, and ISDS 2001.

If I seem anti-social this semester, you have been forewarned. I still love you, though. Remember that as I peer over a textbook to peep out a small "hi."

And incidentally the latest scuttlebutt is that I may double-major in Management and Accounting. I want to become a CPA and if I decide to brave law school I'll go into corporate law. Stay tuned. You heard it here first.

Bliss

The Clayton Kids

"What Have You Been Doing Lately?

...I shall presently answer this question, since I was accused of ambiguity in my last post.

• My Buick is in a coma. Not dead, mind you! Just sleeping. Awaiting certain repairs...
• I went to the National D-Day Museum in New Orleans. That is an awesome place.
• I watched Episodes I-III of Star Wars and was so entranced I picked out some of the notes from the opening music sequence on the piano.
• I just finished Mere Christianity and am starting this evening on The Hobbit.
• I painted my sister Hannah's room lavender.
• I have been listening to the band Anberlin incessantly.
• I beat Super Mario World for Super Nintendo, including the special levels.
• I stained our kitchen table a dark, cherry wood color.
• I invented the internet.
  

The World Missions Summit

I haven't blogged in a while, I know. I'm in one of the stages of my life where a lot is happening. Consequently, I don't blog much. Just know, my friends, that all is well. It has never been better, honestly...in every way.

I was in Louisville, Kentucky for The World Missions Summit this weekend. God spoke a lot, and I am still processing information.

A friend of mine and I both agreed that it was one of those weekends where you go ask God for the answer to one question, and He answers a completely different question. And you're glad God knew best, you're glad that God answered the more important question. And it brings you great joy.

Sorry to be so poetical. But that's the wonderful thing about a post like this. I have told you nothing, yet I have told you everything. For now, let's just say that the unknowns in the rest of my life no longer are a tangled swamp of uncertainty. My life stretched before me is more like a pencil sketch begging for bright colors. Something like what it would have been like to be there when God formed his creation, something like being there when light was formed, when the earth became to take shape...